Bad manners
Why restaurant staff hate you
Poor table manners and lack of etiquette irk restaurateurs and other patrons, a survey has found
Alice Peacock
Requesting lots of changes to a dish, stealing cutlery and simply not turning up to reservations are all gripes of our top restaurateurs.
A survey by the Restaurant Association has revealed the biggest dining don’ts — behaviour that irritates staff and other diners.
Members commenting on the etiquette of their diners complained of late cancellations, significantly late arrivals and difficulty in managing young diners.
Prego Restaurant, on Auckland’s Ponsonby Rd, has taken measures to cope with the troublesome nature of some of its littlest diners.
A list of guidelines for young diners asked that they stay put in their seats during their meal and refrain from “hitting, screaming and throwing”.
Almost a quarter of respondents —
24 per cent — had experienced problems with children dining out while another 65 per cent had received complaints from other diners as a result of kids’ behaviour.
One Auckland restaurant, Number
5, took a hardline approach.
The restaurant did not accept diners under the age of 8. Owner Martina Lutz said that was because it was a “restaurant for adults”.
Lutz’s establishment also asked patrons to ditch their phones in favour of real-life company, although she said this was harder to police.
“I have a sign in the entrance of Number 5 saying ‘no mobile phones’,” she said. “But nobody takes notice — they all have their phones anyway.
“People don’t talk to each other like they used to, especially young people. And I have to adjust rather than not change things.”
Lutz said she didn’t mind customers using their phones to snap a family photo, but playing games or texting, instead of talking, wound her up.
Despite the gripes, Lutz said her customers were generally nice, friendly people.
Late notification of cancellations, or no notification at all proved more problematic for some.
At Parnell’s fine dining restaurant Pasture, food is prepared to the exact number of people expected to prevent wastage.
The restaurant, which caters to a handful of diners each night, also offers several dishes which take two days to make so any cancellations end up in wasted food as well as costing the chefs’ time and its earnings.
Other recurring complaints involved diners failing to give advance notice of dietary requirements, laptop workers spending too much time and not enough money and diners who take a BYO approach to food.
There were also a few one-off anecdotes of chopsticks being stolen at one eatery and at another, a patron requesting a single pot of tea be refreshed with hot water five times in three hours while they used the free Wi-Fi.
But while these habits may be annoying for restaurant staff, they haven’t stopped us from eating out.
Kiwis are now spending 26 per cent of their food spend on eating at restaurants and on ready-to-eat meals, according to Statistics NZ figures from last year.
As well, ANZ data showing monthly consumer spending across the restaurant, cafe, bar and nightclub sector has grown by 15 per cent over the past two years.
Regular restaurant-goer and Herald critic Kim Knight said it’s not just wait staff who have pet peeves either — it goes both ways.
Service was “tricky” Knight said, as diners’ preferences differed.
While some loved maximum attention others were “minimalists” and the best servers were able to read a room.
At the same time, Knight said, the best restaurant staff didn’t presume anything.
“I loathe when I go out with other women and young, usually male, waiters brightly suggest ‘bubbles for the ladies’,” she said.
“We’re women and we know how to say Champagne . . . and sometimes we’d prefer a beer.”
Restaurant Association chief executive Marisa Bidois said the survey proved how important etiquette was in an overall dining experience.
While an increasing number of casual eateries might be welcoming enough to make diners feel at home, Bidois said it was important people remembered they were out in public.