Beehive Diaries

Green MP Chloe Swarbrick checks out the drug testing at Splore, Chris Hipkins faces the needle, Chris Penk tries out April Fool’s and Simon Bridges finally gets to see his beloved Wiggles: but it did not quite go to plan.

Sunday

Green MP Chloe Swarbrick’s Splore moment

Last weekend’s Splore music festival at Tapapakanga Regional Park provided an opportunity for Green Party MP Chloe Swarbrick to see drug testing at music festivals in action. The Know Your Stuff volunteers had named a spectrometer (the drug testing machine) Chloe in honour of her advocacy for the swift law change to allow festival-goers to have their drugs tested. It even had her photo on it.

Alas, Chloe the spectrometer developed performance anxiety, and promptly broke down.

Wednesday

Who’s afraid of the big, bad needle?

Covid-19 Minister Chris Hipkins took on the role of the royal taster when it came to test-driving the Pfizer Covid-19 vaccination for Government ministers.

Hipkins turned up for his jab at Lower Hutt with associate health minister Dr Ayesha Verrall. Cameras rolled as the nurse approached Hipkins who blurted that he was not going to watch. Asked how he felt about needles, he admitted “I’m not a great fan”.

Verrall proved to be less of a wimp. She later attributed that to one of the advantages of her shift from epidemiologist to politician: “I’ve got much thicker skin over the past few months.”

Thursday

MPs fly more than most others, and that means they also hear the interminable Air NZ safety ads more than most.

Photos / Tim Onnes, Paul Taylor. Herald graphic National MP Chris Penk turned his hands to making his own version for April Fool’s Day. Filmed in Parliament’s debating chamber and his office, it features fellow MP Simeon Brown (as the child in the oxygen mask segment). Former Air NZ CEO Christopher Luxon gets a cameo after the credits. Alas, Penk broke one of the safety rules of Parliament: the need to get the Speaker’s permission to film in the debating chamber.

Penk argued “a little known Standing Order” exempted anything published before midday on April Fools’ Day. When Beehive Diaries put that to the Speaker, he said Penk could test that defence at the Privileges Committee. It is hard to know if Trevor Mallard was joking – the response came well after midday.

Friday (last week): Simon Bridges’ Wiggles date

Having put his reputation on the line to get the Wiggles MIQ spots by issuing thundering demands (okay, writing a letter), National MP Simon Bridges finally went to watch them last Friday.

Alas, it was a fraught affair.

He missed out on tickets for the Tauranga concert, so had to traipse to Hamilton instead with wife Natalie and daughter Jemima. His two sons had school and wee Jemima “wasn’t that into it”.

$135 later, he discovered the seats were miles away from the action. To add insult to injury, when the official documents on the handling of the Wiggles were released this week they gave all the credit for getting the Wiggles into the country to the Prime Minister.

They did at least play Bridges’ favourite song: Skinnamarink.