Brum Games: Best and humdrum
Kris Shannon finds odd mix of Comm Games winners, losers
Winner: Kiwi cheer squad
Kiwi fans have been a bit of a rarity in Birmingham, but that doesn’t mean our athletes have been lacking support. Led by Dame Sophie Pascoe, the swimmers especially were a vocal presence in the stands when one of their teammates raced, and then just as loud backstage once that athlete had completed their media commitments. The benefits of the team’s pre-Games training camp in Mallorca were clear.
Loser: Teamwork
The camaraderie among the Kiwi team didn’t always extend to the visiting press pack. One media member, in particular, seemed to feel they, not recently crowned gold medal winners, were the star of the show, the person from whom audiences needed to hear. Reeling off a succession of banal questions must make the athletes roll their eyes; it certainly has that effect on hacks in a hurry to deliver pertinent soundbites to our fine readers.
Winner: Birmingham
From afar, it must seem as though Birmingham has amazing sporting infrastructure to host all these events, particularly without even using the city’s two big football stadiums. In reality, these are the West Midlands Games. The sevens were in Coventry. The cycling time trial was in and around Wolverhampton. The cycling road race starts and finishes in Warwick. It’s nice branding for Birmingham but the rest of the region deserves at least a bronze medal.
Loser: Birmingham
Not that everyone wanted to be here. The athletics world championships being last month caused some unfortunate absences and a few athletes who did come, like pole vault gold medallist Nina Kennedy, clearly took some persuading. “The worlds is our pinnacle, so to come to the Commonwealth Games, this was to make my friends and family and support team proud.” Who needs enemies with friends . . . who force you to go win a gold medal?
Winners: The fans
One of the best parts about squash is the niggle: a player collides with an opponent while hustling for a ball, complains they were obstructed before inevitably being denied clemency. But Sarah-Jane Perry took it a bit far in her all-England semifinal against Georgina Kennedy, repeatedly engaging in heated discussion with an unmoved umpire. At one point, a member of the crowd, in a heavy Brummie accent, yelled, “Get on with it”, which brought the biggest cheer of the match.
Losers: The DJs
The music budget in Birmingham hasn’t helped any perceptions of these Games being a second-class citizen, with the soundtrack on offer at every venue consisting exclusively of a few earworms. ELO’s Mr Blue Sky was a particular favourite — a banger, no doubt, but still not a song anyone wants to hear snippets from several times a day every day for a week. Heeey there, Mr Blue, please go away I need to sleep.
Winner: My puku
Birmingham is famous for many things. Aston Villa, Duran Duran, um, many others. Perhaps the city’s most important claim to fame is the balti, a curry variation named after the dish in which it’s cooked. According to a tourism website, which would never have cause to bend the truth on such things, the balti was “invented in the mid-1970s by a Pakistani Brummie restaurateur”. The Herald owes many thanks to that possibly apocryphal restaurateur.
Loser: Planet Earth
Birmingham made a laudable boast about being the first major multisport competition to be carbon neutral, offering ticket holders and journalists free use of public transport. Which was a nice symbol, slightly undercut by the experience of using that public transport. From out-of-town bus drivers aimlessly circling venues to (admittedly admirable) train strikes, saving our doomed planet often took a back seat to arriving on time . . . in the back seat of an Uber.
Winners: Beach volleyball and 3x3 basketball
Not the events themselves, of course, which answer the question: what if we take a perfectly good sport and make it much, much worse? But the complex in which they were held was the standout feature of the host city. The two temporary arenas were erected in Smithfield, the site of Birmingham’s wholesale markets, and surrounded by myriad options for eating, drinking and participating. Packed with families, it must have been a great way to spend a day, even if they had to watch 3x3 basketball.
Loser: The NHS
These were also billed as the first post-Covid Games and, in a way, that was accurate. In Britain, official advice merely suggests someone infected should think about isolating for a few days. The case tally on August 3 passed 57,000, a serious undercount, but the pandemic was an afterthought, until an athlete withdrew and saw years of hard work wasted.