The Barnett girls: ‘Is Mum actually an angel?’
Simon Barnett told his daughters that he’s in a privileged position to tell the world, “Your mum is unbelievable”. All four sat down with me after I spoke with Simon, and I heard it firsthand.
Samantha, 29, is a mum and firstyear doctor at Christchurch Hospital and is married to Micah.
I was newly married when Mum had her seizure. I beat the ambulance to hospital. I remember meeting Mum when she came in, she was conscious. [The diagnosis] was devastating. You felt like everything dropped out from under you. We moved back in with Mum and Dad; I was the oldest, I felt I could help with the care. I did a bit of that transition period as Mum lost the ability to walk and talk as effectively. Mum is just so incredibly kind and thoughtful, our number one supporter. When I was in Dunedin, she sent me a card and a care package probably every week. By the end of the year, I had a whole wall of cards. You could call her about anything — there was never any judgment, she just provided advice and encouragement.
Sophie, 27, is a stay-at-home mum of two who is a trained speech and language pathologist married to Cody.
We’ve always been an extremely tight family — we all live in the same subdivision. We’re literally within 10 minutes’ walking distance. We’d have our low moments, and the other sisters would pick us up, we’d take turns as to who were the strong ones to carry us through. Mum is the most caring and loving person. People say when things like this happen, ‘oh, this is a real wake-up call to appreciate my mum or my dad’. We’ve never needed that — we always knew how lucky, how blessed we are, how amazing Mum is; we never needed a wake-up call. She would from the first day of school, through primary and middle school, write a handwritten note in our lunch box. When Dad was on the breakfast show, she would get up with him at 4am, just so she could sit with him, make him breakfast. If I can be a fraction of the mum that Mum is, I’ll die a happy woman.
Bella, 24, is a trained and graduated doctor, who is taking time off to nurse her mum.
I was in Dunedin doing studies and came home after about 18 months. For Mum, it was important we finished our degrees. I moved into home for a period. Now I’ve been able to take time off work to look after Mum. Dad throughout has been massive, the backbone. The love that he and Mum have is extraordinary. Mum managed to keep her maternal role the whole time. Up until very recently when she was communicating, she was still Mum. If someone had a bad day, she’d be hugging us, smiling, or rubbing our back with the one arm that worked. I remember when I was little, I was probably 5, I said to Dad: ‘I have something to ask you — is Mum actually an angel?’. She’s been genuinely the best Mum. She’s special.
Lily, 23, is studying IT with the aim of becoming a UX designer. Her partner is Hushdon.
I was 17 when this happened. I was asleep and I heard Dad screaming, and Dad was trying to get Mum to breathe. It was exceptionally traumatic. For my whole life, Mum, Dad and my sisters have been everything to me. When this happened, I was distraught. I am so blessed because of my sisters and Mum and Dad. My three sisters have never left my side, they have stepped up. My beautiful sisters are exactly like Mum — they have Mum’s kindness, Mum’s compassion, Mum’s selflessness. And should I say Dad as well! At school, after the earthquakes, I struggled with my mental health and I called her sometimes seven times a day, she would always answer. She recorded a prayer for me, which I listened to over my headphones. Faith is a big part of our family. Mum and Dad’s love story is extraordinary. Their love is so strong and so pure; it’s like something out of the movies. He has been a superhero.
‘ . . . We always knew how lucky, how blessed we are, how amazing Mum is; we never needed a wake-up call.’