Coutts appears not to give two hoots

I tried to see the SailGP schemozzle with the Hector’s dolphins from Sir Russell Coutts’ point of view, I really did.

Yes, New Zealand has too much red tape and, yes, SailGP has never been guilty of slicing up a dolphin of any description (that we know of ); certainly not a species considered “nationally vulnerable”.

That precise wording means he was technically, semantically right about Hector’s dolphins not being endangered, though he did go a bit OTT saying someone had “lied” about that.

Hector’s dolphins aren’t a single species — their sub-species Māui’s dolphins are critically endangered, estimated to number only 54.

It was Hector’s dolphins guilty of stopping the show at Lyttelton Harbour last weekend — and they are said to number 15,000 by the Department of Conservation.

A whole 15,000, eh? What was anyone worrying about? There’s plenty of the little fellas and we all know how good humans are at ensuring vulnerable species recover and don’t go extinct.

Why, in the last 50 years, only 800 species of mammals, fish, reptiles, birds and amphibians have become extinct, according to the World Wildlife Fund. Plenty left.

And, yes, there is an awkward contradiction in the fact Lyttelton Harbour doesn’t preclude power boats, with their whizzing propellers which could, in theory, produce dolphin sashimi. There are rules, however, they must adhere to. Just as SailGP had to.

I am also certain SailGP has never, as Coutts said, had to take such “extremely restrictive” measures on any other course in the world.

That’s because Lyttelton Harbour is a marine mammal sanctuary. How many other sanctuaries has SailGP raced on? I’m betting on zero.

That’s like me starting up a global chainsaw event, inviting chainsaw experts from all over the world to compete in an open field, slicing up logs and what have you.

But, this time, I want to hold one in the grounds of a day care centre in Auckland — because I have never, ever, hurt a pre-school child with a chainsaw in previous events.

And you can’t turn around and savage people after SailGP agreed to marine sanctuary rules which were applied when the very thing they were designed for happened — a dolphin or dolphins on the course.

Coutts gave us a grandstand view of a seriously wealthy 62-year-old man expressing his frustration and entitlement at bureaucrats and pesky dolphins compromising the $5.5 million he says he pumps into the local economy.

His bitter tirade about the cancelled racing often seemed to reach a pitch only dogs could hear, or maybe he was just echo-locating dolphins.

He harrumphed about taking the event somewhere else — with that veiled threat taking me back to the days after Coutts ditched Team NZ for Alinghi, taking much of the cream of New Zealand sailing with him. There were comments, made a few times

Paul Lewis

Coutts gave us a view of a wealthy 62-year-old man expressing his frustration and entitlement.

after his defection, that it would be better for the America’s Cup if it were sailed somewhere else.

It was, until Emirates Team NZ won it back.

That’s the weird thing — if it hadn’t been for New Zealand public funding, bureaucracy and sponsorship, Coutts may never have been an America’s Cup sailor in the first place.

The New Zealand he now rails against may have changed vastly — but did we really deserve the childish “I’m taking my ball and going home” treatment?

I did get a laugh when, among all the comments, someone pointed out no one was talking about how the orca eat dolphins or mishaps in nets.

I checked with DoC — they said there’s no evidence orca eat Hector’s dolphins (sharks do, apparently) and it turns out there are strict rules around nets, too.

Even if orca do eat Hector’s dolphins, what the blue blazes has that got to do with anything?

Should we get a signed waiver from the orca to stop eating dolphins? Or are we better off to take, you know, measures which may ensure there are enough dolphins left for nature to take its course?

Peter Burling, the New Zealand SailGP skipper who won the Lyttelton event, earlier established the Live Ocean Foundation with Blair Tuke.

Their website says: “To have a healthy future, we must have a healthy ocean. We need to foster an ocean with clear, clean water, abundant fish populations and thriving marine ecosystems. Where we prioritise the importance of the ocean in a healthy future and invest in knowledge that supports this ambition. Where we understand that by restoring and protecting our ocean, we all benefit.”

In one website story, Burling says: “Right now, only a tiny percentage of the world’s ocean is protected. This is no truer than at home, where less than 1 per cent of New Zealand’s ocean space is protected. We might think we’re too small to matter, but New Zealand is guardian to one of the largest ocean spaces on the planet. We’re ocean people and it’s time to get ambitious about ocean action.”

The Lyttelton incident polarised people. Here’s my view: most New Zealanders want the racing and the dolphins. Simple.

But through all of this, Sir Russell Coutts didn’t much sound like most New Zealanders — and he didn’t sound like he liked New Zealand very much.