BARTENDER JAMES POURS HIS HEART OUT
The reality star shares a touching story that shaped how he sees love
This season on First Dates Australia, we’ve seen people of all sexualities, ages, genders and ethnicities set foot in the restaurant hoping to find love. But while they’re a diverse bunch, they all have one thing in common – the first-date jitters.
Thankfully, bartender James Devlin, 44, knows how to settle their nerves and can empathise with what they’re all going through.
“I went on the show in the UK,” James says. “It was awesome. My date was a lovely guy and we had a great time.”
While they didn’t work out in the long run, the pair remained friends until James moved to Australia a few years later. Now at the helm of the Aussie series, he’s loved seeing the sparks fly between new suitors, no matter who they are.
Growing up, James always knew he was gay. He felt comfortable in his own skin and didn’t feel like he even needed to come out to his parents. As he turned 18, he was excited to surround himself with like-minded souls.
“When I went to the gay bars for the first time, I felt at home, like I could really express myself,” he shares.
One night, he was at a gay bar when he spotted his dad waiting in line for a drink. When their eyes met, James felt his heart sink. He’d never officially told him he was gay and instantly felt guilty that he had to find out this way.
“I thought, ‘Oh, no, he’s seen me,’ so I left,” James recalls. “As I processed it more over the next couple of weeks, I thought, ‘Hang on! Why is my dad in a gay bar?’ But by the time I found the courage to tell him I was gay, he stole my thunder and came out himself.”
The next year was incredibly tough on James and his family as they learnt how to navigate the new dynamic.
“Coming out was a brave thing for him to do, but it was also heartbreaking for my mum,” shares James.
Looking back, though, he wouldn’t change it for the world. Within a year of separating, both parents had found love with new partners and came together again as one big, happy family.
His father passed on four years ago, but James is honoured that he could help his dad live out his truth for his remaining years.
“My dad wasn’t living life as his authentic self,” explains James. “I’ve never had to hide my sexuality. I can’t imagine what it must have been like for Dad to go through that for most of his life.
“I want people to know that it’s OK to be gay and have gay parents. In fact, you’ll be the best dressed kid at school if you have a gay parent!”
The fifth season of First Dates Australia is now streaming on TVNZ+.