Her Point of View

OMG! Its My ‘sell By’ Date

The last couple of weeks have been quite interesting to say the least, with so many sad stories of messy breakups, husband-killing wife, boyfriend stabbing girlfriend to death for refusing his marriage proposal, to woman celebrating divorce in grand style. yes, grand style, you read right. Not to mention the very cute situation in my country at the moment, save for my president finally signing the budget. (at least we can breathe on that now).

There has to be a logical explanation or scientific analysis to these relationship casualties as it is getting too rampant, we don’t even know who’s relationship is next, we find ourselves waking up every morning to a new end of another relationship, and the worst part is people can’t be bothered, they sit with popcorn in hand and a glass of juice ready to create memes just for the fun of it to the detriment of parties involved. can you blame them? It’s social media fault I hear you say. But is it really?

recently I have been very deflated with stories of men killing their wives, this norm is on the rising, and I can’t understand how you ask someone out, date her, marry her, she has kids, you beat her and continuously beat her until she finally dies. Happy now?

I am taking it from an angle I think is fundamental today, and I’l be glad to hear if you agree with me or not. Some of you are wondering what my point is already, and what in the world a sellby date has to do with this. I will say everything. every woman has a sell-by date, it is the time she is expected to be handed over/sold to a man as wife. Once you are out of school, working and over 25, you are in big trouble, and God help you if you are the first daughter in your family or any of your siblings are married. So am thinking, if the end of it all is marriage, why don’t we just get kept in a cage from age 5, and get fed till we are at the age of marriage, then we are given to the highest bidder as wife? I thought No too. This means we are allowed as women to grow normally, go to school, get a job, be exposed, acquire sense, choose the right partner and live happily ever after right? So why is this not happening? I want to blame the sell-by date today. Too many women are scared they won’t find the right person because they are getting old and their sellby date is around the corner, which means new products will be placed on the shelves (younger, fresher, prettier, smarter girls) then the struggle begins, there is no time to scrutinize the man you are dating, the target is marriage, the focus is society. The parents need to be pleased, society needs to let me breath, my friends need to know I can get married too. Boom, you are in it before you know, and you begin to see the true colours of what you married sooner than you can say Jack robinson. This is not the man I married, really? Who is fooling whom? And then the game of excuses begin, you make all the available excuses in the book for your man, simply because you don’t want to be tagged ‘divorcee’ or ‘single’! Isn’t it better to have these tags and be alive? The bitter truth is the same society you are living for is the same society that will attend your burial and say all sorts. Who is society? Why care about society? Is it the same society that says stay, and you die, and they marry your husband and ill-treat your kids?

I also think if mothers of today can raise their boys up properly, and not focus on the girls alone, we will be able to raise men who will treat women right.

Now I realize there is another school of women who actually know what they are getting into, they see the signs as clear as traffic signs and still majestically walk in because of this same sell-by date syndrome. Oh please, don’t tell me you went through 30 years of your life to settle for WHATeVer. Let us help ourselves as women, let’s stop this domestic violence that has become a norm. What is wrong is wrong, no sugar-coating. Take the tags off you, don’t work with a sell-by date, don’t let anyone play that card on you, refuse it. And if you are already in it, speak up, it is better to fight the battles from afar, do not protect the abuser, it has never paid off, do not say he loves you, as we all know, Love is not enough! Leave his sorry ass, you will not die, it won’t be the end of the world. you won’t even be the first to start it, neither will you be the last. Let’s stop making our kids motherless. I mean, what type of love is violent? Ah...I am beginning to take this personal. *Shuts down laptop*. For comments, questions, issues or if you have anything you would like us to talk about, reach me on ruky.salako@thisdaylive.com or Text +2347055555888