THISDAY Style - - STYLE & DESIGN - Alero Adollo aleroad­[email protected]­

My mind is weighed down by a train of thoughts that I need to un­bur­den, please in­dulge me for a minute...

Pray, do tell .... why do we put pres­sure on peo­ple to get the M.R.S cer­tifi­cate? Does the in­abil­ity of many to at­tain this re­duce them?

What are the ben­e­fits deriv­able from at­tend­ing the in­sti­tu­tion of mar­riage that makes even the log­i­cal amongst us “shrink in rea­son”? I beg, I beg, I beg, we can­not con­tinue to do this to one an­other. We just can’t! What I find par­tic­u­larly an­noy­ing is how peo­ple are made to feel like they have failed at life be­cause they are sin­gle. What’s up with that peo­ple?

The worst hit are women and the “bi­o­log­i­cal clock syn­drome”, we get cor­nered into the my­opia of “sin­gle is sad” and we are daily forced to kiss frogs in the name of mat­ri­mony.

This much cov­eted in­sti­tu­tion can be beau­ti­ful if you are lucky enough to find “Mr Right for you” as many “Mr Fool­ish feel­ing funky” are lurk­ing in the shad­ows, oblige them at your own peril be­cause you will live your per­sonal hell on earth.

If you are not a com­plete per­son, how can you ex­pect to com­plete any­one, and you in­ad­ver­tently be­come a li­a­bil­ity rather than an as­set. What you are bring­ing to the ta­ble must com­ple­ment not re­pel. How many are truly ready?

You get it wrong when you al­low so­ci­etal ex­pec­ta­tions to dic­tate your pace as you will crash and burn ...

It is in­im­i­cal to your tra­jec­tory when you go into a “by force I must marry de­fault mode”, it clouds judge­ment.

When pain comes at you be­cause you’re sleep­ing with the en­emy, there will be no one to “rough” it with you at that point, so shine your heart or you will haem­or­rhage. Do YOU and mute con­trary coun­sel. The sin­gle state is not a dis­eased state, nor a po­si­tion de­serv­ing of pity, on the con­trary it is a time of dis­cov­ery, a time to blos­som be­cause it is un­en­cum­bered.

Many women over 30 years are usu­ally stressed out be­cause we just won’t let them be, they at­tend wed­dings of friends pet­ri­fied be­cause one Aunty or the other will sweetly bleat “ti’e na a de o” mean­ing your turn will come with a piti­ful ex­pres­sion ......... whilst they prob­a­bly mean well, it is un­nec­es­sary pres­sure.

When a woman finds her “fit” no one will need to preach her into the union, same goes for the man.

Enough al­ready !!!!!! let peo­ple live their lives in their ex­pres­sions I beg, quit bog­ging them with gloom and doom.

How does mar­riage cal­cu­late your dis­tance to heaven, why have we turned it into a re­li­gion, can’t we see that it is fast pro­duc­ing many ca­su­al­ties be­cause of the big­otry, we are stab­bing souls with our words and leav­ing them with fes­ter­ing wounds.

Many day dream about the walk down the aisle but the life after, is a blur. The wed­ding cer­e­mony is just a pre­lude to life within mar­riage, the jour­ney through is not for the faint hearted.

Do not mis­un­der­stand me, if you find a good per­son, who is into you, oh, bliss on wheels, but If you don’t... blow the in­sti­tu­tion a kiss and give it a miss. .

I dare say be­cause peo­ple are put un­der so much pres­sure they set­tle for just any­body and end up in re­la­tion­ships that they have no busi­ness be­ing in and voila, Cyprus is sink­ing.

Putting a ring on it might be good in prin­ci­ple un­til you find the ring tight­en­ing around your neck with the grave in sight, that is if “yaba left” does not come for you first.

Don’t al­low any­one rail­road you into mar­riage or you’ll end up in the fur­nace burn­ing with­out re­course.

I beg make una no vex o, I just dey talk my own o .... didn’t mean to ruf­fle your well ar­ranged feath­ers, but please do your­self a favour, pon­der be­fore you jump.

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