LEGAL HUMOUR

I Can’t Charge You At All

A lawyer who just won a huge class action case worth millions of Naira on behalf of his clients was approached by a Stockbroker with an eye to make quick money. The Stockbroker intended to use the Lawyer’s earnings to make a profit on the Stock exchange and so he propositioned the Lawyer thus

Stockbroker: Congratulations Mr. Lawal, the newspaper is awash with tales of your victory in Court yesterday…. If you would like to double, even triple your legal fees I have some information that you might be interested in

Lawyer: Really? And what will this information cost me Stanley my dear friend?

Stockbroker: Anh anh! Mr. Lawal, how long have I been your stockbroker? And how long have I been securing your money? I can’t charge you, I can’t charge you at all, just 20% of the deal Mr. Lawal that’s all.

Lawyer: Really? Ok, what is this information you have that is worth 20% of my money?

Stockbroker: Blueboat will be listing 200,000,000 units of shares tomorrow. This information is not public knowledge yet, I have used some of my own personal funds portfolio and purchased 100,000 units at N1.00 each, when I sell in 6 months my stocks will have increased by 600%!

Lawyer: Really? (Again) You have already used your portfolio funds You’ve just completed insider trading! Don’t worry, it’s ok, you know you’ve been my stockbroker for long now, when you get arrested I will not charge you for your defence at all, I won’t charge you, just 25% of the deal that you’re being charged for that’s all. You have my number, call me!