El Rufai : The Case of the Misfiring Memo
I did not want to say anything about this memo until now for two reasons. One, the suffering my brother, Audu Maikori is going through as a result of looking for trouble along the Kaduna axis and also because I was not sure if he truly authored the memo which to me is an exercise in beleaguered futility. Well, the moment I read that His Excellency had gone on sabbatical outside the country, I was emboldened to take another look at the issue. To me, that memo is just a lame attempt at distancing oneself from perceived wrongs that the author thinks this present administration has foisted on long-suffering Nigerians. The timing and its alleged authorship remain suspect, thereby leaning towards naked grandiosity. As a full member of the ruling class and one of the leaders who brought this kind ‘change’, this memo, if he truly authored it, is a slap on our collective faces. Why did he write a memo to the President? Why can’t he as a strong sign of his disaffection with the way things are going - as against the vision of the change promised - just resign and ride into the sunset?
The issue is not memo; it is ensuring pragmatic solutions to the many issues facing us and not letter writing. I have read the memo and all I see is what in Shomolu, we call ‘I no dey there’. This is an attempt to stylishly detach from what the author thinks is a monumental disaster while hiding under the pretentious notion that he is sending objective advice. This is a prelude to 2019 and a preparation for a possible run, distancing oneself from what in the author’s estimation is a train wreck. But if that is the goal of the memo and its leaking, I think then the target has been missed. Nigerians of today are much more discerning. Today, we see clearly and the people who continue to destroy our future are etched permanently on the walls of the corridors of infamy. You will be surprised that you will find President Buhari’s name in the book of life faster than some of these memo writers. For we have learnt to look beyond the obvious. We know who our true heroes are and I tell you they have not been born.
I am aligning with High Chief Dino Melaye on this matter simply because I too have gone through this kind thing before. I attended Command Secondary School Lagos and failed the fourth form three times and they asked me to leave. Kai the most painful thing for me then was the fact that I had a half-caste girlfriend and I felt my absence in school would jeaopadise our relationship as many senior boys were eyeing her. I was convinced that it was my rivals who orchestrated my failure and eventual expulsion from the school. Well, that is a story for another day. That was how I left the school and my beautiful Russian/ijebu Mulato escorted me to the gates with tears in her lovely eyes. My people, failure is not a death sentence, the fact that I did not finish did not stop me from rising again and finishing with two degrees and today, I am the Duke of Shomolu and you are reading me regularly every Saturday. So let us not be throwing this certificate scandal periodically at public officials. Except there is a clear case of forgery or outright impersonation which I do not think is the case here, we should remain focused on fundamental issues. If Dino attended Ahmadu Bello or wherever he is said to have attended and did not graduate, how does that affect his ability to perform as a sitting senator. Or is the minimum qualification to be a senator a first degree? The last time I checked, it was not so. A man has the right to fail o, he also has the right to use eight years in a four-year degree programme. It is his problem and that of the people who sent him to school. For that to now become an issue of national importance beggars believe. Why can’t we as a people be serious-minded for once and face major issues that continue to bedevil our society? Now the full Senate is going to spend huge sum of taxpayers’ money to investigate if Dino went to school or not; something that would have been sorted out at the INEC screening level or at worst, via a simple letter to the Registrar of the said school and a simple response from this official would resolve the thing once and for all. Abeg, let’s face other things, people are jumping into the lagoon in frustration and here the Senate is investigating if one bald-headed senator went to school or not. As my former oga Chibundu would say, ‘are we for real?’ tions. You see, the EFCC chairman is the anti-corruption czar, his job is to weed out all forms of corruption especially in the public space. In doing his job, he will step on powerful toes and in not doing his job he will incur the wrath of the people which leaves him in a tight spot. In this case, the chairman has performed excellently well. He has implemented the whistle-blowing policy in such a way that people are throwing away money at airports and running away from it. I met a Customs officer the other day and introduced myself as an investment banker, he ran away, calling me ‘these BVN people’. So to now subject this person to a confirmation process superintended by the people who are within his purview of duty is to expect the inevitable. If I were the Senate President, I would have even torn his file. Confirm him ke? So we were not surprised to hear of his rejection, it was only natural. How many senators are being investigated, how many high-profile people are being investigated and you honestly thought he would be confirmed? No JUJU can bring about that confirmation and if not carefully handled, it will derail the anti-corruption drive.
So what is the solution? My humble opinion is that the chairmanship of the EFCC should be an electoral position. Let Nigerians vote for the chairman so that he will be answerable to us, with the constitution of the Federal Republic of Nigeria and the courts checking his excesses. That way, he does not need to be confirmed by anybody or owe his position to even the President but Nigerians. I swear, it will work, let credible candidates throw themselves up for election and let us publicly screen them and decide who will lead the EFCC. Meanwhile, Mr. Magu is in my good books, you remain my hero. Don’t worry, it is well.