The Duke – Did I Vote APC?
By the time you read, the presidential election would have come and gone. The question that I am sure you all are yearning for an answer to is how I voted. Did I vote APC? Well my answer to you all is askor!!!!!!. That is how we used to answer this kind question in those days. Yes askor, wetin concern you, is that the problem in Nigeria today? Well, the election has come and gone and no matter the outcome the most important thing is for us to do all that is possible to preserve the unity of the country. This is very critical. We cannot after all these years since Independence continue to
JAGABAN’S LAST POLITICAL DAYS?
You know I am a certified scholar of Nigerian politics. I belong to the Kunle Amoo school of politics having passed through his tutelage at the Political Science department of the University of Ibadan where I came out in flying colours. I swear ask them, the records are still there, I know some APC people are laughing and doing their nose one kind. Yes o. So today, I will attempt an intellectual peep into the immediate future of this colossus. Asiwaju Bola Ahmed Tinubu has been nothing but a force in our body politic. After fighting the Military Government of Sani Abacha to a standstill on the platform of NADECO, he emerged the single most important politician in the south west after parlaying his formidable influence from Lagos throughout the south west.
But let me say this, as I look critically at the evolving scenario post-election, I sense an ebbing of his powers. The situation where he threw away the umbrella was just a symbolic admission to himself on the growing frustrations he is facing in keeping it all together. For him, a win or lose for his party will do nothing to assuage his downward spiral. I see a second-term Buhari working assiduously to cage him, limit him to his base and possibly trying to yank off the base from him. He would not be allowed to continue to exercise control of a powerful city state like Lagos the way he has. And with the possible movement of Ambode to the center on the back of this seeming victory, Jagaban will have to be at his wits’ end to contend with that onslaught. We have already seen how the failed Ambode Impeachment went. I think if you ask me, the Jagaban will be better be behaving like political kindergartens throwing away umbrellas like a toddler after being refused a taste from the mother’s breast milk. We must remain tolerant, calm and patient. I know the issues that pervade us are very vexatious especially with the way things have been run in the last four years, this still doesn’t throw up a justification for violence, bigotry or ethnic separatism. This is me in my own little way trying to evoke the spirit of oneness no matter the outcome of the election. Both victor and vanquished must come together to sue for peace. The election threw up a lot of issues, it gave off during an Atiku Presidency and the reason is simple. Those ones know how to wheel and deal. They can cut deals and they recognize the importance of negotiations and compromise in policy formulation and execution. The ride has been long and rewarding, we have witnessed democratic despotism laced with popular acclaim and an obviously shallow attempt to stand with the masses. But the truth is that like every other thing, the influence at some point will have to ebb. This inevitability cannot be stopped, slowed or diverted. It can only be embraced and prepared for with a veritable succession plan. The Jagaban should immediately start looking at his lieutenants for a credible succession and here lays the ‘killer’ problem. Not because there are not any credible candidates but because this empire has been built on the personal carriage of one man, a huge charisma and a willy-nilly dependence on native intelligence, wit and boldness. These sterling qualities would be very difficult to have them replicated in any one person. If it is not the Jagaban, it cannot be the Jagaban. Awolowo tried it with Jakande who was nicknamed ‘baba kekere’, it did not really pan out despite the fact that Jakande was a performer. So do we see a Baba kekere in Aregbe? Mbok, make I just keep quiet. My book is coming out on this phenomenon; please wait for it, na only N500 I go sell am. So go collect your trader moni and wait for it. Thank you.
ASARI DOKUBO: CALM DOWN!
Na wetin na? Na only you dey? Every day I will just be seeing you on Instagram ranting and shouting. The issues on the ground cannot be resolved with this your us the platform to discuss some of these issues both sensibly and irrationally. Scorecards were thrown up and promises were made. For me, in all the noise, I think the love for one Nigeria was enhanced by the dirty fight to rule it. The voices of separatists’ movements were finally eclipsed and the need to keep Nigeria one was enhanced. The Duke says well done to all combatants and would be inviting both winner and loser to a cocktail dinner as soon as everything is calm. Both party chairmen should kindly contact my office for a definite date. Please no stone throwing at my party o, I don’t tolerate indiscipline. style. We need to be more circumspect, mature and deal with the issues with facts. Please my brother, all the rants only add to the wahala. This your last video that I watched asking for people to come and vote is commendable. People like you who have a voice can only do well to shout and mobilize people towards the democratic process and also point them towards the credible protection of their votes. Only then can we achieve developmental sustainability. I like you o, especially that your big belle that makes you look like an Ijaw Father Christmas. I like the way you talk, even though I don’t like some of the things you say. I like your boldness, your courage under fire, your fearlessness and most of all your charisma. My 10-year-old daughter after watching the video asked why you were so angry and why you were shouting so much. I tell her that hungry is catching you that maybe you never chop. I cannot tell her what the true situation was because that would be ‘messing up her tiny mind’. My brother can you try a senate position. Voices like yours in the Senate would go a long way to safeguard our democracy. No vex again, pele no worry. It will be well. I don yab you small but if I no yab you who go yab you? Calm down, no be fight, na democracy.
OBITUARY – OUR PENSIONS
You know I belong to this Habib Bank Alumni whatsapp group and discussions there can be passionate. So I dropped a report that the Federal Government through the issuance of Treasury Bills and Bonds has borrowed about N6trillion out of the whole N8trillion. Na him one man say he get PhD come attack me o; call am fake news. Me sef, I panic and delete the information out of fear. That is how I now went to my friend Ugodre’s well respected website NAIRAMETRICS. The thing is even worse o, an additional N166billion was borrowed just last October 2018 according to the PENCOM report they were quoting. Mbok I just went back to the group and decimated the PhD man with facts. My people it is over, we have finished. So they have taken about 70% of our pensions to do tradermoni oooooooo. How will they pay back, what is the plan? If these monies were not used for regenerative purposes then this generation of Nigerians and their children’s children and those ones grand children have been sold into eternal damnation. The pension reform that was carried out by the Obasanjo regime was brought about to sanitize the situation after government could not meet its obligations. The reforms threw up the credible system that has generated these kinds of funds and were expected to be ring-fenced. But with the issuance of these government instruments which I must say are said to be risk-free is making me fear o if government cannot pay back nko,. The sovereign rating of our country of Bb- (stable) is not enough comfort o hence this obituary I am writing o. This is not APC or PDP matter or Obasanjo being expired milk. This is DISASTER.
IBIKUNLE AMOSUN – WHO IS YOUR DADDY?
As I watched his big cap, I felt like s………. him. My anger was boiling over. He was shouting in Yoruba, ‘Don’t disgrace me, don’t disgrace me, our father is here’ and finally what did they do to his father? They stoned him.
Which kind of son is this? A son who will not respect his father, worked for his father’s humiliation and at the point of the very humiliation, stands up and shouts in kangaroo voice don’t disgrace me when he had already sowed the seed of the disgrace. I am sure the senator has never heard of the phrase ‘loyal party man’ because if he has, he would have accepted the position of the party to field Dapo Abiodun and go with the flow. But for very obvious reasons he decided to go to another party while still supporting his father but fighting the party for other positions. Who does that? This is nothing but ‘bole ka ja’ politics and he saw the fight as the crowd pelted them on stage tired of all the shenanigans. The APC has said they will deal with him but they themselves are not serious people. This whole thing did not start from the day the stones and pure water sachets were thrown. This has been going on for sometime now. Why they did not take decisive action to collect Ogun state from him beats my imagination and this is what you get when some persons are bigger than structures. Chief Amosun has tried to blur the lines created by structure by saying since you won’t take my candidate I will leave to another party and still remain loyal to just one man - the President. This is Amala politics played by Amala people of the Amala Party and what do you get in return, pellets and stones. Na wa!
SDP: JOKERS IN THE PARK
I hear they have suspended Donald Duke and maybe Jerry Gana, their Presidential candidate and I blame them not. Last week I had written about Donald Duke and had mentioned that he would have fared better within PDP than in all these contraptions that are a little better than town unions. In fact it is even an insult to compare town unions to this one sef. How many hours to election, you are suspending your candidates? The reason is not far-fetched: these were platforms that were set up for shallow pecuniary reasons or as shadowy platforms to be merged at the right time and infused into any of the major parties. Either way, for a person like Donald Duke to be enmeshed in such a dance is really sad. My brother, don’t worry, come back home, retrace your steps and go back to where you truly belong and start afresh. I don’t know what the future holds for you but no be this one. These ones na real jokers in the park.
TONYE COLE – DUST YOUR FEET
My brother you have fought the good fight and have shown uncanny resilience and courage and I think it is time you come home and dust your feet and relax. He don do as we say it in Shomolu. When I saw the footage where they were firing shots as you spoke and you continued standing when everybody else including the paramount leader of your village was on the floor, I began to pray for your safety. You see no be everything person can do. That battle ground no be your own, you belong to us. Come back to Lagos so that we can continue with our life; that one was too dangerous. Come and even see sef, they have given you new name. They now say, ‘refused APC Gubernatorial Candidate of the APC’. This is not good. The good thing is that at least you did not lose in the primaries and unlike my good friend Professor Utomi who was led to another venue while the primaries were still going on. You were not humiliated. It’s good, come let’s do a welcome party for you. You truly deserve one. We go try another time. Thank you.
DAVIDO: A SALUTE!
Me I am beginning to respect this young man with the definite stand he has taken in politics. Now this could be as a result of his family’s long history in politics. Whatever the case, the young man has shown uncanny courage by pitching his tent in one camp. I have started following his social media handles and his posts are quite profound showing a huge understanding of the issues. He has talked about power that the youth control, he has talked about the need to remain resilient despite onslaught by the powers that be. He has talked about taking a stand against tyranny and oppression. Those he is referring to I don’t know o. But the truth is that he has very unlike his colleagues shown a clear understanding of the issues and what needs to be done. Followed his performance at the Port Harcourt rally of the PDP and was really impressed with the way he handled the crowd. The war is not yet won, I swear with people like Davido, we just might see a concise and pragmatic push by the youth to bring about a refreshing change.
CODE OF CONDUCT TRIBUNAL OF LIFE!
I don’t know if I am looking for trouble o. But I really cannot resist this quip at the CCT. As this was going to bed, I was seeing news feed saying that the CCT has ordered the arrest of the suspended CJN. This na real CCT of life. Well, they must have their reasons so I will keep quiet. Just that with elections so near, this kind of thing suppose be on a slow so that other motives will not be read into it. Why the hurry to finish this case in record time. Not this same judiciary that there are cases that last forever but then again as a layman, what do I even know? The suspended suspect already has like 600 SANs to argue his case, he should not be my worry. Anyway, I greet the Chairman or is it the Chief Presiding Officer of this body even as I wish him well and good proceedings. Let’s hurry up and finish this case abi or what else can one say?