My Views on ‘The Platform’
He’s got a gift of the gab and dresses smart. But unlike the other guys, does some of the things he says. I was getting furious at ushers for not letting me and here he was, not to be noticed yet waved them away and at me at once to go ahead. I dashed to the front clutching my handbook of Igbo glossary to represent or rather present to one of those in the front pew and in a moment was making my way out of the hall of fame. Famous individuals come to teach in the Church. I got to focus later in view of “The Platform” this time around.
The thing is not all bad, people got to talk and try to speak. Now, I got the view in focus, when one of the guys like a movie-star began to talk and I read his lips, so we went he on …I come from ‘government school’ yours is a show of the chosen to receive light from darkness, which in no doubt is your choice of my voice to hear loud and clear.
You know what am talking about, yours is a programme of anti-ethical in arts theatre, artificial-church, look we’re not gold but shine on you….” By the way, I forgot that today is 1st of May, that’s why I don’t remember who said ‘happy new month’. I now mean this other platform of wolf-gang, where wolf down VOM, eat Von. Gang with woman that don’t gang-up, man does not reveal his secret for he cannot go round.
Man cannot teach woman her duty, woman cannot teach man her responsibility. They are there ‘as you like it’. Prof de teach student wey neva pass-out, come teach government wey don start to work. Now back to annual Church platform organized as governCulture, ment that is non. The topic is given up-front, no neutral invigilators or honest arbiters. But they gather, all them that think not on what they spend but spend on whatever they like, get on the platform from the market-place to lace their sermon with anecdotes that underscore how wise or great they were.
One gets unto the podium, a look of disapproval on front-row faces ‘this man wants to eat his cake and have it, he’s had his fair-share’. To serve in any government you’ve got to be a hypocrite but in Nigerian government you’ve got to be an Actor. And I don’t mean those elected or appointed into executive but the boys quartered in the legislature, the full castrated judiciary and the incarcerated press.
The one that will save his country must have learnt to do without things good in themselves. But now the Church try to out-do even pre-empt the world, so they trudge in, including some of those guys you’d come across no matter which route you chose to take. Some boring phrases begin to fly ‘’ Strategic, Inclusion, Conversation, System, Structure…” and one do double talk on security, so Pastor asked “…are you saying that Governors cannot secure their states” I think some governors will but can’t, instead some more double talk.
Then his body-language interjects “…you minister in the Church, I was once a cabinet minister, I got no degree in security now you drag me out from my academic and work experience, for which I was not sober. Super-artificial honorifics, you’re done for.
Men! This platform got no traction, church overlook much to oversee. I used to be both a politician and administrative staff, civil servant-leader, If only you knew am your ruler.” Pastor own body speaks “… no, I now have to take to or give into choosing my words, hahaha, a round of delirious applause” that is followed by more jesting forbidden in Eph5:4 but they hire comedians to church these days and it gets even more hilarious.