A mom’s world of gratitude
LAST Sunday, we all celebrated Mother’s Day. This is a day for everyone to celebrate the gift of moms who gave the nurture and love that brought about the person we are today. In today’s inclusive world, I also recognize dads who have to be moms due to circumstances beyond their control, and all those non-conventional moms who might not have given birth to their child but have been the best source of care and love for their special blessing. It was quite timely that Mother’s Day this year fell on May 8, which is the birthday of my dearest nanny “Manang Eyang,” who as I have shared in past columns was like a mom to me until her passing in 2009.
Also, I want this article to be a dose of vitamins for mothers. I will be the first one to raise my hand to say motherhood is and can be overwhelming. Although there are many references to parenthood, it does not change the fact that each of our family, our children and our circumstances are unique. When one becomes a mom, you cannot help but worry about both today and the future. When I speak to younger generations, they would tell me that they are afraid of having children because it seems like there are so many responsibilities, which they are afraid of being unable to handle.
Especially as a full-time working mom, motherhood has been quite a journey for me as my eldest turned 16 and my youngest 12. Although there is still a lot to be done, the most important thing is I am happy where I am today as a parent to two funny, inquisitive, resilient and warm kids. What I would like to spotlight is the convergence and consistency in my role as a mother and as an employee. I believe that motherhood is a gift to our workplace—and our work is a gift to motherhood.
Motherhood teaches us a lot of great values to be patient, fair and nurturing. Whether we like it or not, we are role models to our kids, especially in their earlier years. Because of this, there is great accountability to be assumed. We are responsible for this gift of life that is our child, and how this gift can contribute to society one day. I bring these values in being an effective leader to my people.
On the flipside, the workplace throws us a myriad of tasks and experiences that hone our ability to efficiently manage situations. Strategic and long-term thinking methods have always proven effective in driving a company’s success. More than this, I learn as much at work so I can use these experiences to teach my kids. I share to my kids what my day was like at work, and how I was able or not able to handle things.
Last but not the least, my greatest source of “mom vitamins” when things get a bit much is to look at my “world of gratitude.” I would go through my albums on my iphone and be grateful for the roles I get to play, and the meaningful relationships that I gained by being a wife and mother. Below is a list of people who we can gain strength from and can be truly grateful for, as they prop us up to be a happy mom in this seemingly overwhelming journey of motherhood:
1. OUR PARTNERS IN LIFE—THIS can be our husband or life partner. This is a person who you know literally and figuratively would walk hand-in-hand with you. For me, I have always seen my husband as my side-by-side partner. I didn’t want someone to look up to, or someone to look up to me. I wanted a genuine relationship built on trust and mutual values that we can share to our children.
2. OUR FAMILIES—FROM my dad to my sister and my in-laws, I find comfort in how our families give us their genuine support, as well as the best laughter especially when we spend vacations together. This pandemic alone, my sister, Joan, was a big help to our family when my husband and I had to take turns accompanying my daughter to her out-of-town trainings.
3. OUR FRIENDS—IT is great to have friends who look out for us and our family. My best friend Liza has always been there for me. My grade school and college friends are a circle of genuine care, where we feel safe to share our vulnerabilities as parents.
4. OUR KIDS—I always have “the best of .... ” albums of my kids especially from trips. I love going through them when times are the toughest. Just to see their transformation from growing up is truly priceless.
5. OUR FAITH—LAST but not the least, it is always good to have verses or songs that remind us of our purpose and meaning as moms.
Being a mom can be daunting at times because it is like a journey to an unknown. There are guides but many factors both internal and external are highly unpredictable.
I salute moms for their daily commitment to do their best. Love begets love and right at those moments when we feel most lost or defeated as a mother, I hope we can always go back to any or all of our “worlds of gratitude” to always know that we are not alone and someone is always rooting for our happiness. Belated Happy Mother’s Day to all. ■