Covid-19’s emotional toll
When Covid-19 struck in 2020, people experienced intense emotions – fear, anxiety, disbelief. Then there was sadness and grief as we lost friends and loved ones. Times were uncertain as the virus raged. There was not enough protective equipment, and we did not know what the next day would bring.
We then settled into some sort of routine, the so-called “new normal,” trying to deal with working from home, online schooling and changes in quarantine restrictions. But this was still exciting in a way, something different from what we were used to, and we were hopeful that we would settle down eventually.
Now that the pandemic shows no sign of dissipating, another feeling prevails. While you still have the energy to get up and shower and attend that next Zoom meeting, it’s no longer amusing to be in lounge wear all day, or that there’s another Korean series to binge watch on Netflix. You just feel aimless, and what used to make you happy no longer seems to spark joy.
Psychologists say that one of the best ways to manage is to name them. Some say they feel down, or they have the blues, the doldrums…. For me the feeling is akin to the term, “meh.” A neither-here-nor-there feeling. (Watching the Emoji Movie might help give you a visual image of what it looks like.)
It appears that there is a term that perfectly sums it up – languishing. Coined by sociologist Corey Keyes, languishing is a sense of stagnation,
Now that this pandemic has lasted over a year, another feeling prevails.
somewhere between depression in which you may feel empty and hopeless, and flourishing, which is the peak of well-being.
While some patients who had Covid still experience symptoms long after the infection (or long-haul Covid) more people who have never had the disease may be struggling with the emotional long-haul of this pandemic.
I see it in my patients, my parents – when will this end? I’ve seen in my children who used to look forward to school days off and summer vacation but are resigned to spend just another day at home.
Even if you can leave your home for work or errands, how can you have a meaningful conversation with anyone when you have to be six feet apart and can only be together for a few minutes, all the while trying to catch your breath as you raise your voice from behind your mask and face shield?
So how do we combat this languishing feeling?
Give yourself a break. If your days are turning into unending meetings and webinars online, set some boundaries. Certain days are non-Zoom days. Or set aside some time each day to enjoy a book or a cup of tea.
Get immersed in a project. Whether it be finally organizing old photographs or cleaning out your closet, starting a fitness program, getting involved in school or charitable organizations – there is always something to get involved with.
Set goals, even just small ones. Maybe today is the day you finally clean out that drawer next to your bed. Or tomorrow you will set your alarm a little early to watch the sun rise and do some stretches. And maybe you can finish that book you decided to read last year. Connect with others. We all miss our family and friends, but remember that staying within your own household is the safest for everyone. Online meeting applications are no longer just for business or educational purposes. Many have attended homecomings, birthdays and even weddings online. You can meet with people halfway across the world and it only takes a few minutes to get there.
Get help if you are struggling to cope. You are not alone and help is available. Call your doctor to ask for help if you can’t manage to do your daily activities for several days in a row.
And as one TV series said, it’s okay to not be okay. You don’t have to be cheerful and high-spirited all the time, but remember that there can still be bliss on a bleak day, some connection in a lonely week, or purpose in what seems to be a perpetual pandemic.
We should all continue to take precautions not only to protect ourselves, but the ones we love. Get vaccinated when your chance comes, it is another way to stay protected. People who are fully vaccinated have a chance at being able to take off their masks when they are together.
And remember that no matter how bad things may be, there is always something to be thankful for – the roof over your head, the food on your table and the blessing to be alive as you open your eyes when you wake up each morning.