THANK YOU, BETH DAY ROMULO
The perfect woman for the writer, lover, and diplomat
Many of the General’s friends were against their marriage, with President Ferdinand E. Marcos himself voicing out his disapproval.
One would think of someone from a foreign land marrying a Filipino as a stranger, the way Josephine Bracken was the “dulce estranjera” or sweet stranger to Jose Rizal.
The description may be said of Beth Day Romulo who came to the Philippines in 1972 first as a girl friend of the eminent diplomat and former United Nations President, General Carlos P. Romulo, and, not too long after, his wife. In time, though, she would be so at home in our country that she might have been born here.
Many years earlier, in 1959 they first met but had their respective spouses. In 1972, they saw each other again, this time both widowed.
Not long after, they were wed in civil rights and finally, in a Catholic wedding ceremony.
Carlos and Beth getting together as a couple and choosing to live in Manila did not immediately get the approval of many Filipinos, including that of Ferdinand E. Marcos, then President of the Philippines, who feared it would have a backlash on the Philippine-American negotiations on the stay of the latter’s military bases in the country.
But the love that the couple had for each other won over the doubt and censure of the groom’s kababayans. Theirs would prove to be a marriage made in heaven, this despite the disparity in age.
What went for the couple, other than the sincerity in their love, was their shared intellectual life. The great conversation between them was a proof that he matched her passionate thirst for knowledge as a writer.
As it turned out, it would be a successful partnership, she providing the companionship and fulfilling the role of a wife to an international statesman. He, through his demonstration of his love for her, inspiring admiration and respect for them both. What became obvious was her being an asset to his exemplary career. Early on, she proved herself adept at performing various responsibilities from hosting the most elegant dinners, to standing beside her man in a reception line at the Waldorf Astoria, to engaging in conversation with the leaders of the world, and with these, one would imagine, dealing with frivolous women in high places.
While many criticisms were spoken against then First Lady Imelda R. Marcos, mostly in hushed tone, she knew how to deal with her simply by being the pleasant and well-mannered woman that she always had been. Thus, one heard or read of Beth Day dancing at the palace, attending state dinners, and later, because she couldn’t do otherwise being a writer, reminiscing her years at the palace with gusto, humor and, well, a certain displeasure though written with finesse and grace.
The bottom line was Beth was a loving wife, and when the General passed away, something that she had expected would happen, she continued to live in the Philippines, akin to the biblical Ruth who vowed to remain with her departed husband’s mother. In Ruth’s case, she chose to stay in her husband’s motherland and be with his people. No love for this country by a “sweet stranger” could have been demonstrated.
If General Romulo was a great man, his choice of Beth Romulo, one who would be his willing loved one, partner in both his public and private lives, and a mother to his own children and grandmother to his grandchildren, was perfect. Not only was it reflective of his wisdom, but most importantly, it was one made with a heart sensitive and responsive to the longings of his inner being.
This country was fortunate to have Beth Day Romulo in its midst. And in her passing, we thank her for being the right woman for the eminent man we were and still are proud of, and for being the epitome of a great Filipina by choice. If she was at home with us, it was because she loved this country and she loved the man who brought her to his home and his people.