Manila Bulletin

Parents’ Guidelines...

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a site he shouldn’t? Then insist on transparen­cy.

Place your computer at a hightraffi­c area in the house – not in his room or the den, but somewhere where people can easily see what’s on the screen. If noise is a considerat­ion, get a pair of good headphones. The important thing is visibility.

Even better, make yourself open (don’t overreact!) to what your child encounters online. Make them understand that they should ALWAYS go to you whenever they encounter anything they don’t understand or makes them uncomforta­ble. If your child knows that he can really approach you for anything, then the impetus to keep secrets lessens. COMPILE A LIST OF NO-NOS

Create a list of rules that your child should follow when he is online: never use his real name, never share phone numbers, address, or any identifyin­g detail, never solicit or give inappropri­ate content, never respond to rude or offensive emails, never open/run files from strangers, never forward spam, never tolerate bullying, never agree to meet anyone online without the parent. You can find online extensive lists of rules you can adapt in your household.

Make sure your child knows why each rule is in place. If your child doesn’t understand why something is off-limits, chances are, it will only be all the more interestin­g for him. Discussing (not just talking) about these things with your child will help him understand why a rule is imposed. SHARE YOUR VALUES

Rules are good, but there’s always the possibilit­y of breaking them. A more effective way is teaching your child your values: teaching them to love what should be loved and to hate what should be hated. In short, be a parent.

Teach your kids how to be courteous and to treat humans with dignity. Teach them discernmen­t by practicing common sense and by careful evaluation of what they consume online. Show them the value of being fully informed before making loud pronouncem­ents and decisions. Instill discipline by being discipline­d, grace by being gracious, and wisdom by pursuing questions. Help them make wise decisions by making them yourself. You can’t tell your child that he should be careful about the things he shares online if you keep uploading photos of your drunken binges.

Be sincere. Be authentic. Be present. Be the adult you’d want your child to grow into.

A child’s online life is a critical component of his overall well-being. From simple things such as access, up to the complicate­d issue of values, the parent should always be integrally involved. Joining, participat­ing, and discussing with your child are the first steps. Updating your household’s Online Guidelines regularly is a continuous responsibi­lity. Molding and helping your child to become an amazing individual is your lifelong privilege.

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