New York, New York

AS I write this article, I am on the plane and am quite hung over from a marvelous ten days in the Empire State – my second home, New York City. While I opted to move back home three years ago when I finished my undergraduate studies at Columbia University, I’ve still been fortunate (not to mention extremely blessed) to find worthy enough excuses to return to the place that has built quite a substantial part of who I am today. I am not writing this article as a tourists’ reference to talk about my favorite places in the city, nor is it a personal rant about why I love the city so much, in my attempt to cure my longing for the place I just left a few hours ago. Rather, I’d like to share with all of you why I feel New York City is not for everyone. In other words, as much as I love it for all that it is, I understand and take no offence at anyone who may have quite a different sentiment. I’ve been wanting to write this for sometime now, actually, and I think right now would be the most fitting time to do so.

“The city so nice they named it twice” and as the famous song goes “Concrete jungle where dreams are made of, there’s nothing you can’t do, now you’re in New York.” Both quite apt descriptions of the place. For one, there’s nothing more scenic than a stroll down Central Park, seeing all the blinding lights on Time Square or just walking down blocks through busy streets and massive buildings. Whatever suits your fancy, there’s something for you in this cosmopolitan and vibrant city. Whichever one of the boroughs you may find yourself in, you’ll find yourself amidst different cultural clusters and will get to know New York from different perspectives. Yes, there’s a place for everyone, but why then do some not identify with this city as much as others do?

First and foremost, I must put it out there that New York is very different as a tourist and as a student. I’ve been blessed with the opportunity to see the best (and worst) of both worlds, and I think what makes my heart grow even fonder and my visits even greater each time I’m there is knowing how much New York is capable of building ones’ character and resilience in order to thrive. I remember being lost in all the liberty that was suddenly bestowed upon me my first year of college. And being in the heart of New York City at this time was extremely distracting (there are so many things going on – uptown, midtown, downtown – that if I wanted to take my studies for granted, there were so many reasons to skip class) and tested discipline. It was not until my last year in college that I realized I had been zapped into a bubble – one that thrived on competition and did not know the meaning of rest. When this would occur to me in my earlier years of living there, I’d somewhat try and rationalize this as the “side-effect” of being in an Ivy League institution. But as the years went by and I started to meet people from other Ivy Leagues and learning what their lives were like, I came to the conclusion that yes, while competition and stress exist all around, living in a city “that never sleeps,” this is further exacerbated.

When one says New York never sleeps, one is quick to assume that this refers to the lights on the beautiful albeit blinding lights on Time Square that never go off. When one has lived in New York, one realizes that there is so much more depth to that description and nothing comes close in accuracy when describing the lifestyle of New Yorkers. It teaches you to be top of your game just to stay afloat all day everyday, and on days you want a break, you realize the following day how much catching up there is to do. “A mile a minute” otherwise known as “New York pace” is rather obvious to tourists who may be alarmed by the brisk walking pace of natives crossing the street (especially at rush hour) with coffee in one hand, head set on, and phone in the other. Sometimes, they may even bump you and not apologize. Rude, right? But more often than not, it has come to be accepted as the norm because everyone is on that page. In other words, a breather doesn’t exist during work hours and/or on work days most of the time – even during that half-hour subway or taxi ride. In fact, this “down time” is most often used to answer emails. Yes, you’re right – e-mailing works like text messaging on that side of the world. A missed opportunity could just smack you in the face if you sit on an e-mail for more than an hour. Many ask me why I’m so diligent in responding and why I’m always doing so many things at the same time, and most likely than not, that’s the reason.

Multi-tasking is what’s common and going to bed with zero unread messages is not going to set you apart – it’s what’s going to keep you going and afloat. Needless to say, living there created this love/hate relationship with the place, that ultimately culminated in just SO MUCH LOVE – one that grows even more through the longing, nostalgia and every visit back. And as I stood there on the day of my graduation, and Frank Sinatra’s “New York, New York” started to play, I sang it with so much heart because the song just resonates so much now that I’ve experienced life as a New Yorker. New York is aspirational and so much of it gives life to many a ones dream – mine included. Everyone wants to “Wake up in the city that doesn’t sleep” but ultimately, and I echo Sinatra, you dictate your sink or swim in the Big Apple – “It’s up to you, New York, New York.”