Mothers in combat boots

Iused to reference my own motherhood travails in navigating the corporate terrain, so to me mothers who were corporate mavericks were super moms. This was before I was fully immersed in the even more challenging realities of women in active military service who also tended to their families and raised their children.

Having been more involved in the military service for a few years now as a reservist officer and engaged in many military activities and operations, except actual combat, I have personally seen and heard the amazing stories of mothers in the military.

The stories of these women who, at some point in their military lives, decided to build a family despite knowing the expectations from the profession of arms, have been heartbreaking, to say the least. Some need to leave their children for long periods of time due to their deployment assignments. These women in uniform miss special milestones in the lives of their children or are not around for those moments when the kids would just need their mother’s tight embrace after a tiring day at school, or want a kiss on a bruise after falling from a bike or playing with classmates.

Most mothers are blessed to be around for their children, especially when it matters, but such is not so for our mothers in uniform. They are able to cope, however, with a lot of valuable help from family, friends, and support groups who ensure that their physical absence still can still be stories of victorious and rewarding parenthood.

Some of the most accomplished Filipina military mothers shared their stories of love and triumph over the challenges of motherhood. In turn, I wish to honor them by sharing their stories with you.

Many more military women like them face these agonizing experi

ences as parents and often feel the pangs of guilt over being “absentee” parents. But they are empowered by the thought that these sacrifices are in honor of a sworn duty to serve the nation and the Filipino people. So, when you are spending time with your children, think of these women sometimes and the kids they often have to leave behind so we may live in a society kept peaceful and safe from domestic and foreign aggressors.

Running in heels is hard enough, but in combat boots it’s harder, at least to me who have spent half of my life in the former and now, in my current incarnation, in the latter, traipsing around in military fatigues. I am honored to have met so many women I proudly call my sisters-in-arms.

Happy Mother’s Day to all the mothers and those who act as a mother to someone!

The author, Lieutenant Colonel Jannette C. Arceo, is an Army Reserve officer serving as the first female commander of the 403rd Ready Reserve KAAGAPAY Battalion of Laguna. She is the mother of Ramon, Romano, and Rafa Arceo.

No language can express the power and beauty and heroism of a mother’s love. —Edwin Chapin

The greatest challenge I had to face was dealing with my grief at the sudden loss of my husband, my life partner, and best friend. I had to put on a straight face, performing my role as my troops were relying on me to take the lead. I was in a unit where my role entailed representing the nation to the world. I was chosen to be the security officer of the President of South Korea for the ASEAN Summit held in the Philippines. All these as my boys likewise needed me to play my maternal roles, guide them in handling the loss of their dad, and be the head of the household as well. But I prevailed. I handled my emotions nonchalantly and managed to perform my duty with flying colors. On top of that, I still got to be a mom and a dad, notwithstanding the odds. —Lieutenant Colonel Francel Margaret P. Taborlupa, Philippine Army

There were hardships and difficulties, but I would always remember the reason I joined the profession of arms. When my daughter Thea came, she gave me strength to carry on with my duties as a soldier even if it meant being away from her. She was diagnosed with Microcephaly and I am just grateful to the Philippine Army that I am assigned to areas and posts that allow me to monitor her health status and be with her occasionally. I am grateful to my husband, who is also a military officer, for his support. There are many times I feel I have failed in facing the many challenges both of being a mom and a military officer. But I am reassured with the feeling in my heart that my baby Thea thinks I’m a supermom. —First Lieutenant Michelle Estares-Layan, Philippine Army

Raising a kid is a choice, more than a responsibility. And that choice is made tougher with the demands of the service. Yes, it is not easy but, in the end, you always follow your heart. Being a parent, it gives a whole new view on the meaning of life. —Brigadier General Jo Regis Bandarlipe, Philippine Army

Helping me in the integral part of watching over and raising the kids while I perform my duty as a soldier is my second mother. I honor “Mommy Dete” or my aunt Jacinta Adriano who not only took care of me as a baby but also came to the rescue to help out with my kids when I was deployed, doing my duties as a military pilot. Soldier moms cannot do it alone. We are indebted to our extended families who take care of us and our children, while we take care of the country’s defense and security. —Colonel Ma. Christina O. Basco, Philippine Air Force