My father is a hoarder and a collector

IAM the son of a hoarder and a collector. People wonder why we have several stuff in our house that my father did not want to dispose, especially the shoes. Papa justified this by saying that while he was growing up, he never had the luxury of owning new ones since — one Tita would buy us pants while both he and my mother came from a another took care of the shirts. The family with very modest means. shoes were usually sourced from He tried to instill in us the value Bangkal. of small blessings. We became the real-life models Long before became for in the 1970s until famous, we were already wearing 1990s. ukay-ukay ukay- ukay second- hand clothes and shoes, The term is derived sleeping on beds, sitting on chairs from the Cebuano verb ukay, which ukay-ukay and sofas that Papa bought from the means “to dig” or “to sift through” shops in Bangkal, Makati. respectively.

Bangkal is known for the rows of It is synonymous with the verb dusty shops selling wagwag, an act of dusting off a piece hundreds of cast-offs — a wild mix of clothing by taking hold of one end

segunda mano of furniture, artworks, home décor, and snapping it in the air, and shaking dinnerware, glassware, antiques, the item to dust it off. and anything under the sun, many All throughout their more than of them vintage and all pre-owned. 30 years of marriage, we never saw

Seldom did we wear brand- our parents engage in physical fights. new clothes, except maybe during Although we were accustomed Christmas when our aunties bought to Mama’s lines, we knew us clothing on an installment basis that was just how she expressed her

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emotions: only through words and eye contact.

Papa will always say that before Mama would be mad at him, he already forgave her. Papa would just step back. He would not overreact to the emotions of Mama.

They had a reverse role: Mama took care of the financial well-being of the family while Papa was in charge of the spiritual and emotional needs of the children.

Mama was the breadwinner and Papa was the family caretaker.

He would tell us stories of life, how proud he was of us, his children. He often stressed that he had nothing to give to us but our future. Two of his sons entered the priesthood, Fr. Philip Welthy and Fr. Stephen Melvin.

Upon the death of Mama on May 17, 2002, Papa chose to seclude himself from the outside world and just stayed home.

He would just linger in our library and arrange several items according

their commonalities like old toothbrushes, pencils, tools, toys, office supplies, and other house stuffs) and put them inside plastics or cartons, and either hang them or put one on top of the other inside the library.

One year and six months later, when my father died on Nov. 16, 2003,