Violence-caused trauma among children
There can be no better measure of our governance than the way we treat our children, and no greater failing on our part than to allow them to be subjected to violence, abuse or exploitation.
—Jessica Lange
WHAT BECOMES of the brokenhearted who had love that’s now departed?” In the same song, Jimmy Ruffin answers the question: “I know I’ve got to find some peace of mind, I’ll be searching everywhere just to find someone to care!”
What becomes of the children of war? Just like those in war-torn Zamboanga? The children of hostages, killed and spared? The children of soldiers killed and heroes alike? What becomes of the children of the fighters of the Moro National Liberation Front, both the annihilated and the incarcerated? Here is a parallel to those queries. As I arrive home after a week’s work in the city, I am appalled to see my young daughter wiping the tears of her elder playmate. She fondly calls him “KuyaWee.” And Wee is crying profusely albeit no sound comes out of hismouth, while my daughter wipes his tears. From this scenario, one can be certain that Wee is gay, a young gay. But him crying is a light year away from his usual bubbly and boisterous self.
A day before, his father was made to kneel on the road outside their gate and his Kuya was slapped repeatedly, and their tablet and other gadgets and money for their food are now gone, Wee describes the incident. His Ate, pregnant and due to give birth this month, still trembles with fear, Wee says, adding that she is praying that “unta iuli ang kwarta sa akong panganak, wala nako magamit” (themoney formy delivery be returned because now I don’t even have a single centavo to pay for it). Wee vomits and continues his soundless crying.
A neighbor of mine had been subjected to a lightning raid for illegal drugs. The grandfather is now in jail for allegedly being a meth user, but his family suffers too. His grandchildren cower in fear and suffer periodic vomiting because of trauma.
On a personal note, I abhor drugs, drug users, drug pushers and all “in-betweens.” But as a fully functioning human being, aware of my humanitarian responsibilities, I was made to choose between being a hypocrite and being a good Samaritan. I chose the latter, even if it was downright awkward: helping Wee, the young boy who kisses my hand when I pass by their home and the leader of the preteens in our neighborhood.
Section 2 of Republic Act No. 9262, An Act Defining Violence Against Women and their Children, Providing for Protective Measures for Victims, Prescribing Penalties Therefore, and for Other Purposes, declares “that the State values the dignity of women and children and guarantees full respect for human rights. The State also recognizes the need to protect the family and its members, particularly women and children, from violence and threats to their personal safety and security.” Sadly, children are the most affected by the evil that elder men do, yet have no idea about how to react to such deeds.
Wee may grow up to be a good man. His elder sister may give birth to a baby boy. The lost money may be returned or might not find its true owners anymore. But the children, they are “collateral damage” of their elders’ misdeeds. They are victims of the violence of authorities in their effort to set a deterrence to a major menace. But how can we undo the cracks of this bud vase called children’s minds? Would there be peace beyond? Would there be lessons transported fast-forward into the future? Or would these just be all aches, all pains?
Wee, vomits again and cries. While we carry him to the hospital, we can’t help but cry, too. As our neighbors curse the raiding team and point out what they perceive to be harsh actions, they can’t help but blame the father for his vice. Afraid of retribution from the police, it was obvious that the family had resolved to keep the grudge to themselves. As I carry Wee, he vomits again.
We were on the highway and about to board a tricycle. Wee’s mother realizes that she doesn’t have a penny left… 897-4794, or e-mail readersadvocate@inquirer.com.ph
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