RH and divorce
IF you drive through the city streets, it is not uncommon to see a woman lying on the sidewalk nursing an infant and with several other half-naked children sprawled nearby. It is unimaginable how a mother could want to raise her children under such circumstances. Hungry and homeless, does she really want to be perpetually pregnant?
My best guess is no. Nonetheless, this is her life. My best guess is, she has no choice.
I have interviewed all the house help through the years who either come from families of between 6 to 10 children or have 5-7 children themselves why this is so and the common thread in all their stories is that it is because of drunken husbands who force themselves on wives.
What is the Catholic Church’s solution to rape by husbands? Are the wives to simply suffer the fruits of rape because artificial methods of contraception are a sin? When the Church says that only natural methods of contraception are acceptable to plan the size of families, it is almost laughable. But not for the women who must bear forced sex and forced pregnancies as a result.
Many of these women are beaten black and blue on a daily basis, forced into sex by their drunken husbands and kept perpetually pregnant. Without access to artificial methods of contraception and divorce, there is no solution within reach to end their suffering. Is it any wonder then that some of them resort to killing their husbands?
Domestic violence against women is especially rife among the poor and uneducated. These women are already victims of violence when they are forced to have sex with their husbands. Are they to be subjected to more violence when they are forced to bear the consequences of rape, not just for nine months, but for the rest of their lives?
Wake up. Not every woman who becomes pregnant is happy. Not every man who causes pregnancy accepts responsibility. Not every pregnancy is welcome or a cause for joy for either party. But whose belly grows big for nine months? Whose life is overturned overnight?
Not every pregnancy is a product of consensual sex. Sometimes, it’s a product of violence.
Children should not be a by-product of the sexual act. Conception must be a choice not a consequence.
The reproductive health (RH) bill is not as important to the educated middle class who can make informed decisions and find the means to access different methods of contraception to plan family size than to the marginalized sectors of society who are completely powerless in the face of poverty of choice and information.
Divorce will not be as important to the educated middle class who can hire fancy lawyers and file annulment cases than to the poorest of the poor who must live their lives in perpetual abuse and violence. The Church is quick to say that laws that promote artificial methods of contraception and separation endorse expediency and therefore immorality.
Say this to the battered woman pregnant with her tenth child.
Expedient can be immoral, yes. But sometimes, it can also save lives.