THE 10 GIRLS YOU WILL MEET IN CEBU
1. The good girl
She’s the girl you see eating a brownie cup ala mode at La Marea on a Saturday evening. She doesn’t go to the club because she has to get up early the next day for Church, which is why she looked so familiar. That’s where you first saw her… in church… at the communion line. You were just too hung over that time to recognize her now.
She’s your “#ChurchCrush” who you try to impress with your impeccable mastery of the Apostle’s Creed. Sometimes you wish you could just go straight up and beso her during the “Peace be with you” portion of the mass.
She’s that good girl that you’d be so lucky to settle down with, if only you could figure out how to stop being such a douche.
2. The bad girl
She’s that girl who always cuts class and doesn’t care about anything.
She’s so badass because she has tattoos and smokes.
Nyeeee.. soooo badddd!!!
3. The fashionable girl with a blog
She’s the girl with the lookbook.nu profile that says : “22-year-old dreamer from Cebu/ Manila/Los Angeles/New York,” which is weird cause she really just lives in Kasambagan.
You meet her at some fashion event and you’re photographed together in Zee Lifestyle Magazine. She forces you to change your wardrobe and to get a more fashionable haircut. So you get some skinny jeans, a pair of brogues and you have the sides of your head shaved.
For a while you become the “it” couple of Cebu and you spend most of your time sitting on the sofa at Topshop playing Candy Crush. But then you got into a really big fight because you didn’t button your shirt all the way to the collar when you went to Barcode.
4. The cute girl at the gym
She’s the girl who shares those “fitspiration” memes on Facebook and tweets “Gym Toime” all the time. She’s more into WODs than OOTDs. You go buy a yoga mat, join a yoga class and sprain your groin just so you could go up to her and be like “Namaste girl.”
You then ask her out for salad at Café Georg after Thursday night Zumba. All goes well until she realizes you’re six abdominals short of a six pack and you’ve never finished a triathlon. So you go back to eating chicken nuggets and Tatang’s boneless lechon, going from beast mode to obese mode.
5. The girl who ives really far
She’s that girl you travel to exotic places for—exotic places like Lapu-Lapu, Liloan or Talisay. At first you enjoy the long drives with her on the passenger seat, watching the sun set over the Mactan Bridge. But after a while the distance takes a toll on the relationship as well as on your gasoline mileage. You try to work things out by agreeing to just meet up at Park Mall or the v-hire terminal, but you know that long distance relationships hardly ever work.
This is why you only hang out with girls from Lahug these days, cause let’s face it #maypa ang Lahug, naay hug.
6. The nerdy girl who studies in coffee shops
She’s got that post-grad vibe. She sits at her table at the coffee shop sipping latte with her nose buried in a textbook. She’s either studying law or medicine. She’s obviously a smart girl and she probably puts a lot of value in her intellect. This is why the “4 pics 1 word” game always works.
You just go up to her and ask for help solving a “4 pics 1 word” problem that you just can’t seem to figure out. Make sure you get all up and cozy whilst showing her your iPhone screen. Then it’s just a matter of time until…. #PITI!!!
7. The girl with a boyfriend
She’s that awesome girl you meet but then you find her on Facebook and her profile photo is a photobooth collage with some dude. And you’re like “Of course.. she has a boyfriend..” How could she not? Right? She’s perfect.
You don’t know her boyfriend personally but you are 100% sure he’s a douche. I mean, like, what does she even see in him? The only thing her boyfriend has that you don’t is sadly the only thing that, to you, is worth having… her.
You had the chemistry but the timing was off. So you’re left there quietly lurking just waiting for things to become “it’s complicated.”
8. The super attractive girl with the gay best friend
Are you familiar with the saying that goes “for every super attractive girl, there’s always a gay best friend”? If you’re not, it’s probably because it’s not a real saying and I just made it up. That doesn’t mean it’s any less true, though. I mean, if you really analyze it, the hottest girls always have some sort of gay best friend. And the more attractive the girl, the gayer the gay best friend is.
So I suggest you throw the homophobia out the door my dude, listen to some Frank Ocean and get yourself some gay homies. Cause them gay dudes got the hook up with all the finest ladies.
9. The girl you thought was the one
You meet her and you automatically hit it off. She’s attractive and funny and you can’t find anything you don’t like about her. You think that she could very well be “the one,” the girl you’ve been looking for your whole life.
Then one day, out of nowhere, she goes and says “stuffs.”
Taya your life.
10. The girl who feels like…
Imagine it’s Sinulog and you just walked from Baseline to Banilad. You’re tired and dirty and all you really want to do is get to your house, take a shower and sleep.
Imagine that feeling when you finally do. She’s the girl who makes you feel that way when you’re finally with her.
She feels like sunny weather and the cool sea breeze. She’s the one who feels like Cebu in the summer time... like there’s nowhere else you’d rather be.
She’s that girl… The girl who feels like home.
(Reposted with permission from Mikel’s Tumblr account.)