Things you should stop expecting from others

One writer exclaimed, “The biggest disappointment in our lives are the result of misplaced expectations when it comes to our relationships and interactions with others.”

This is a wake- up call for all of us because most often we always have expectations with our loved ones and those whom we meet along the lanes of life.

A friend had the greatest shock of her life when she found out that her husband, whom she had dated for five years prior to their marriage, is not the same person whom she had known and envisioned. She confided, ‘ I thought that he is a responsible and mature person. But after our marriage his true self surfaced. I realized that he is a mama’s boy, a “barkadista,” and most of all does not share his salary with me. I realized that you would never know the character of the person unless you live with him in the same roof.”

My friend is not alone in her lament in life. In fact, all of us fall in the same trap. But the “Scribd. website,” has this to say, “Tempering your expectations with other people will greatly reduce unnecessary frustration and suffering, in both your life and others and focus on the things that truly matter. Here’s how to do it:

• Stop expecting others to fit your idea of who they are. Loving and expecting others means allowing them to be themselves. When you stop expecting people to be in a certain way, you can begin to appreciate them. Pay close attention and respect for who they are and not for who you want them to be. Every human being is remarkable and beautiful. It just takes patient set of eyes to see it.

• Stop expecting others to suddenly change. You can’t change people and you shouldn’t try. Either accept who they are or you choose to live without them. When you try to change people, they often remain the same. Support them and allow them the freedom to be as they are. They gradually change in the most beautiful way.

• Stop expecting them to know your thinking. People don’t read minds. They will never know how you feel unless you tell them . In life, you have to communicate with others regularly. You have to tell people what you are thinking. It's as simple as that.

•Stop expecting them to agree with you. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to live a life you are excited about. Don’t let the opinions of others make you forget that you are not in the world to live up to the expectations of others. Just be yourself.

• Stop expecting them to respect you more than you respect yourself. True strength is in the soul and spirit, not in the muscles. It’s about having faith and trust in who you are, and a willingness to act upon it. Decide this minute to never again beg anyone for the love, respect and attention that you should be showing yourself.. Today, look at yourself at the mirror and say, “I love you, and from now on I’m going to act like it.” It is important to be nice to others, but it’s even more important to be nice to yourself. When you practice self- love and selfrespect, you give yourself the opportunity to be happy. When you are happy, you become a better friend, a better family member and a better you.

• Bear in mind that people rarely behave exactly the way you want them to. Hope for the best, but expect less.