A Secret Shared

will encourage it – without themselves getting hurt by our disclosures. Trained counselors and therapists have an oath of secrecy, so we will be unloading our secrets into the right ears. Moreover, they have techniques for helping us learn to live with our own feelings.

A priest or pastor can also be a source of much needed mental and emotional relief. The family doctor or lawyer can help a lot, as well; while they may not be in the same level of spiritual ascendancy as the religious, they are often able to perform the same function for the person who needs to communicate his inner torment. In more severe cases of inner distress, however, a psychologist or a psychiatrist may be necessary.

Sharing our secrets with others can indeed liberate us from psychological burden. But it can also later render us heavily laden with regret for opening up. Others might use our revelations against us; even if they wouldn’t, we ourselves might feel exposed and ashamed, and no longer worthy of their respect.

Those of us who are on the receiving end of secrets must be just as careful with our appetite for confidential declarations. The little entertainment we derive from it can be a threat to our own peace of mind. We shall always be watchful not ever to let the knowledge out.

A secret shared – whether we are the ones giving or receiving – can cost us our precious relationships. The people closest to us, especially, might be devastated to know that we were having ‘another life’ or keeping other thoughts beyond their knowledge. They might feel cheated, and might grow suspicious of us.