The Philippine Star

Teenage life philosophy

- By FRANCIS J. KONG

As people in business we know many things.

We know how to turn around a business and make a profit. We know how to sell stuff, produce products, penetrate markets, acquire properties, lead people. But the one thing that boggles the minds of the greatest of people in business is trying to understand teenagers.

There have been books written about it. There have been seminars on how to parent them and there have been endless sermons and homilies directed towards them, but teenagers are still beyond our understand­ing.

We should be honest in accepting this truth because every businesspe­rson went through the same crazy stage too and we also did not understand ourselves too. One teenager with nose rings, baggy clothing and spiked hair said to a friend:

“I don’t really LIKE dressing this way, but it keeps my parents from dragging me everywhere they go.”

Many teenagers pass through at a stage in their lives thinking that old folks like us don’t know as much as they do. I am blessed with a son who was courteous and respectful when he was in his teens. There was no way I would let him get away from this. But reality is that many in their teenage years always think they know more than their parents. And in spite of all of today’s modern technology, adolescenc­e remains that period of time in a young person’s life when he or she refuses to believe that someday they’ll be just as dumb as their parents.

I will never forget one businessma­n in America many years ago saying: “I went to a Grateful Dead Concert and they played for SEVEN hours.” Seven hours for one song! I’m sure he’s kidding, but it looks like this man like many others find it hard to understand the world of teenagers.

Charles Sykes, the author of DUMBING DOWN OUR KIDS, provided for high school and college graduates a list of 11 things they did not learn in school. In his book, he talks about how they feel good, politicall­y correct teachings created a generation of kids with no concept of reality, and set them up for failure in the real world and so he offered the following no nonsense ideas which he calls “rules” and I honestly agree with all of them. Here are Rules for Teenagers: Rule 1 - Life is not fair; get used to it. Rule 2 - The world won’t care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.

Rule 3 - You will NOT make $40,000 a year right out of high school.

You won’t be a vice president with a luxury car, until you earn both.

Rule 4 - If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss. He doesn’t have tenure.

Rule 5 - Flipping burger is not beneath your dignity. Your grandparen­ts had a different word for burger flipping; they called it opportunit­y.

Rule 6 - If you mess up, it’s not your parents fault, so don’t whine about your mistakes, learn from them.

Rule 7 - Before you were born; your parents weren’t as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes, and listening to you talk about how cool you are. So, before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parents’ generation, try delousing the closet in your own room.

Rule 8 - Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life has not. In some schools they have abolished failing grades; they’ll give you as many times as you want to get the right answer. This doesn’t bear the slightest resemblanc­e to ANYTHING in real life.

Rule 9 - Life is not divided into semesters. You don’t get summers off, and very few employers are interested in helping you find yourself. Do that on your own time.

Rule 10 - Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.

Rule 11 - Be nice to nerds. Chances are you’ll end up working for one.

My son today is in business and he is doing very well. He loves music and he loves speaking and teaching as well. Looking back I am so grateful that God allowed us to have a great relationsh­ip. I tried to understand his world and he tried to understand mine. Today he speaks and he teaches, and he is reaching out to young kids and sharing life values and lessons.

The one thing I did not do was to exasperate him when he was in his teens. Today I see the benefit of such actions.

Learn their world. Gently inspire them to learn yours. But most importantl­y, teach them godly values and make them understand that success begins with them, but it is not about them.

We may know much about our businesses, but if we do not know anything about our own kids then that would turn out to be disastrous. At this stage in their lives influence them for the better. Practice and apply all your leadership skills at home with them. For after all, the best inheritanc­e you can leave your children is a good example.

(Experience two inspiring days with Francis Kong learning leadership and life skills in his widely acclaimed Level Up Leadership July 18-19 at the brand new Shangri-La Hotel at the Fort. For further inquiries contact April at +6392855917­98 or Success Options at 7270291 / 7275692 or register online at www.leveluplea­dership.ph)

 ??  ??

Newspapers in English

Newspapers from Philippines