Well, well, well. Just when I thought I’d heard the last of the online-bomb squad another honey-coated offer shows up on my phone. Remember I promised last week to change my number so the advertisers of bomb opportunities would have to look elsewhere for their salacious talent? Well, procrastination got the best of me. The latest come-on from the bomb squad reads: Hello, good day. Are you willing to sell 20 photos for $1000 USD?
Now, I’ll admit that as soon as my eyes fell on that USD I started ticking debt collectors off my list. Let’s be honest; we all have way more than 20 photos on Facebook and Instagram, all easily accessible. I figured the invite was too good to be true but decided to poke around anyway. “What type of pictures are you looking for?” I enquired. Silly me, I had no idea what kind of response to expect, but there it was in a flash: Nude photos, without your face. Only from neck down is needed. If photos are sent tonight you receive your payment by 11a.m. tomorrow via Western union.
I swear: in all of my wildest days I never encountered such hardass brass. Jus’ so? Is this latest horror to be added to our already lengthy list of plagues? All kinda talk about the government getting their own jet, so as to save on travel expenses; all kinda FB hogwash about putting an end to live coverage of House sessions; but when it comes to online pimping, not a word not a word not a word. Talk about making the abnormal normal!
Then again, as a fellow female in distress told me this week: if we have to tie our waists any tighter before we get that promised VAT relief, then we might as well sell headless images online—whether of ourselves or not. I mean, there are scores of free-porn sites and thousands of naked babes to choose from, right? But ladies, please be careful about the angles. You don’t want your unemployed and tetchy significant other bumping up against a picture of some headless lady and imagining certain exposed parts of her anatomy remind him of you, right? As for me, well, I’m definitely changing my number. Like now. USD or not!