SPILLING DA BEANS

The Star (St. Lucia) - Life Begins 2 Nite - - WHAT'S INSIDE - By Biky B

Well, hello there all you 2Niters. Wel­come to an­other run around de jun­gle where you do what you have to do to sur­vive and de hell wid cor­rect­ness, po­lit­i­cal and oth­er­wise. To be hon­est, all dat re­ally mat­ter to Biky B is get­ting you your reg­u­lar dose of beans to get you through an­other week.

UN­RULY PICKNEY:

At de rate tings go­ing it look like is not Chiney in­va­sion we have to worry about so much as de Ja­maican baby boom. You can take Biky word for it; over de years is nuff Ja­maican dance­hall artiste com­ing here and mak­ing pickney with Looshan girls and den disappearing af­ter dere per­for­mances. De lat­est ah hear about is one in­volv­ing de self-pro­claimed un­ruly boss dat sow some se­ri­ous oats on his last visit. Now de baby mama here try­ing her best to con­tact de seed drop­per for child sup­port, prefer­ably in U.S.—not Ja­maican dol­lars. Maybe she should leak her story to de guy dat ready to help for de ask­ing, no strings at­tached!

FLY­ING HIGH:

Just when Biky B think a cer­tain lo­cal fe­male singer would be hit­ting de high notes on de Bill­board charts, it seem like she rather be rid­ing high on de White Horse in­stead. De way Biky get it from de grapevine, if de young woman eh get her act to­gether soon she could find her­self in a card­board box on de street wid a bunch of other for­eign junkies. Ah hear some kind souls try­ing to give her a hand but when your head as mess up as hers it’s hard to de­cide who’s a Good Sa­mar­i­tan and who playin’ good just to get a chance to be bad. Biky wishin’ her well, doh.

Holy Ghost:

Talk­ing about Good Sa­mar­i­tans: was Springs pray­ing on DBS for Ti Chas and his apos­tles de other evening or was he pray­ing his last Tai­wanese sup­per was not re­ally his last Tai­wanese sup­per? Dese days peo­ple pray­ing from all three cor­ners of dere mouth, you know. Just take a peep at Face­book. One minute dem song­birds chirp­ing from a yel­low song­book and de next is from ah red book and some­times even ah or­ange one. It so bad dese days Biky cyar tell CAPS from SLAPS, let alone CRAP from SAPS!

Loaded Gun:

Be­fore ah go ah have to men­tion dis letter I re­ceive about a hot model chick dat sleep with a mar­ried man de other night. Next ting she wake up wid a se­ri­ous STD. But what re­ally get her goat is how de man take de news as if is noth­ing to lose sleep over. Well next ting you know de young hottie gone to wifey and let her know her hus­band is a car­rier. But hottie get an­other sur­prise when she dis­cover wifey put her on so­cial me­dia. Ah can as­sure you dat eh no fake news. Some of de hottie’s model friends al­ready gone cold on her, although some of dem cryin’ fake tears in her pres­ence. Peo­ple ah go leave tings here fo now. Have all you self a great week­end, and re­mem­ber doh be no­body’s fool just be­cause this is April Fool week­end.Okay? See ya’ll on de flip­side and as al­ways throw some beans my way at [email protected]

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