MARRIED MEN, KEEP YOUR RINGS ON!
Donning a wedding band seems optional these days for men – even Prince William doesn’t wear his. But ARETHA LOH believes it’s an absolute must.
It’s high time guys stopped dismissing their wedding bands as “just another piece of jewellery”, says our female writer.
Awedding band used to be a sure way of spotting a taken man – especially helpful when you’re wondering if that hunk at the bar is single. So imagine my shock (and horror) when my newly-wed girlfriends told me that their husbands tend to go band-less these days.
Prince William infamously boycotted his ring, as did Jay-Z and Will Smith, and the trend seems to be catching on with the average joe. Why? “My ring gets in the way when I fiddle with my bike or do weights at the gym,” said one husband I know.
Another said: “I’ve never been a jewellery person. I’m not about to change just because I’m married!”
Worse still was my girlfriend, who has been married for six months. Her response when I asked for thoughts on the subject: “Just because he doesn’t wear his ring doesn’t mean he’s not committed. Plus, if he wants to stray, wearing the ring wouldn’t make a difference, so it’s no big deal,” she said nonchalantly.
No big deal? Call me old-fashioned, but my future husband will be keeping his ring on. No, I don’t believe that a ring will act as a sort of “talisman” that will ward off other women, but keeping it on speaks volumes about a guy’s attitude towards marriage and his wife.
I’ll admit, wedding rings have been commercialised and glamorised into a billion-dollar sentiment of love – which girl doesn’t secretly wish for a whopper of a diamond on top of hers?
But one thing that hasn’t changed for me is what the ring represents: a sacred union between two individuals. A public declaration of their love, if you will.
And it’s definitely not just another piece of jewellery. A man who keeps his ring on shows his wife that he’s devoted to her and wants to spend his life with her. It shows that while he’s independent, he will always be connected to her in some way – till death do them part. Isn’t that what marriage is about? And, dear wives, even if you’re okay with your husbands going around band-less, spare a thought for the bachelorettes out there – I know they’d appreciate a heads-up that a man is off-limits.
Take, for instance, my 28-year-old friend, Jane*, who nearly got involved with a married man. “He was goodlooking, charismatic and didn’t show any signs of being married when he first chatted me up at the bar,” she bemoaned.
It was only after their second date that she did some Facebook sleuthing and realised he was married. When she asked him why he wasn’t wearing his wedding ring, he shrugged it off, saying that he wasn’t into jewellery. No wonder she didn’t even spot a ring tan.
Anyway, it’s safe to say they never went on a third date.
I’ll admit, wearing your ring is not the only way to show commitment, but to me, it’s one of the more meaningful and dedicated ways.
And if the ring means something to the wife, well, I say that’s enough reason for the husband to keep it on.
*Names have been changed.