“He went from wallflower to social butterfly”

KARISHMA DHIR, 29, AND RAKESH DHIR, 31, BOTH BANKERS

For most of 2010, Karishma was frustrated by her husband’s non-existent social circle. Naturally shy Rakesh was a virtual hermit and spent most of his free time at home.

The problems started after Karishma and Rakesh – both Singaporeans who had met while pursuing undergraduate degrees in London – returned to Singapore in 2010 to work. While moving back was a joint decision, Rakesh was apprehensive. Unlike Karishma, who had only spent four years in London and still had many friends in Singapore, Rakesh had no close pals here as he’d lived abroad for nearly a decade by then.

“He never had any after-work plans and would spend all weekend at home,” Karishma says. He was too shy to make an effort to meet new people and became increasingly moody about his lack of a social life. Karishma’s attempts to set him up on “blind dates” with her own guy friends also failed – the men didn’t have much in common, leading to awkward silences and painful small talk.

Rakesh also ended up becoming, as Karishma puts it, “ridiculously clingy”, sulking when she made her own plans, checking up on her often and guilt-tripping her into staying home with him over the weekends. Says Karishma: “We ended up spending way too much time together and would go for days in cold silence because I felt he was not giving me my space.” Karishma played “matchmaker”, asking her friends if they knew guys with similar interests to Rakesh. She would then quiz these potential friends about their hobbies, typical weekend plans and even the sports teams they supported. Soon, she found a

group of guys who were just like Rakesh’s close friends back in London – “soccer fanatics, gym buffs and self-confessed beer aficionados”.

Karishma also organised social events to bring together Rakesh and these potential friends. “I had to orchestrate fake birthdays and anniversary celebrations and even sat through some boring soccer games to make sure he didn’t flake on plans I had set up,” she recalls.

Once Rakesh found that he could talk to these men easily and that they shared common interests, he loosened up and began to enjoy himself. Better still, he began making plans of his own, building his own friend base, and he soon stopped spending all his time with Karishma. She says: “In fact, these days, he’s often the one making plans for the weekend while I’d rather just sleep all day!”

Marie bought Allen his first skincare set six years ago. It contained a good cleanser, moisturiser and eye cream. Unfortunately, as Marie recalls, “he refused to use it, saying guys don’t use that kind of stuff.”

So Marie spent the next six months reminding him every day about the importance of taking care of his skin, quizzing him about whether he’d used the products she’d bought and even slathering creams on his face for him on days when he was too lazy to do it. Despite his complaints, he never resisted.

It paid off when, six months into his new routine, Allen began to receive compliments about his skin. Marie says: “Colleagues and family said that his skin looked less dry and that his fine lines were starting to disappear.”

Soon, following his skincare routine became a habit and Allen would even remind Marie to put on eye cream before bed. But the ultimate proof of Allen’s conversion into a skincare fan? He bought a couple’s facial package for himself and Marie as a treat for her after she had their second child in 2012!