WHY YOU DON’T AL­WAYS HAVE TO PLAY IT COOL

Be­ing “easy to get” (read: read­ily avail­able) doesn’t mean you’re a pushover. It means you’re not play­ing games, you’re mak­ing de­ci­sions on what you want, and you’re down for tak­ing mat­ters into your own hands, say women who put them­selves out there.

Herworld (Singapore) - - CONTENTS -

Be­ing read­ily avail­able doesn’t mean you’re a pushover.

“I don’t say no when I mean yes”

“When I first met my boyfriend of 10 years, we were class­mates who got along well with each other. When­ever he asked me out, I didn’t think twice about say­ing yes, no mat­ter how fre­quent the dates were. Dat­ing’s not some­thing you keep a score on. I don’t be­lieve in wait­ing around and re­ply­ing to texts hours later just to string him along.” – Lynette*, 28

“I asked him to kiss me”

“I had a friend whom I was into for some time, but he wasn’t tak­ing my hints. So one day, when we were hang­ing out at his place watch­ing TV, I bit the bul­let and asked him to kiss me. He was sur­prised, but obliged. It must have worked, be­cause soon af­ter, he in­vited me on a hol­i­day with him and his sis­ter. We ended up dat­ing for two years. It didn’t work out, but I never re­gret­ted what I did – at least I tried!” – Tessa*, 29

“I told him I wanted to be with him – but he’d have to wait”

“Af­ter just four dates, he asked if we could be ex­clu­sive. I was keen, but told him that he’d have to wait as I was still get­ting over an ex. I knew it was a risk as he might not still be in­ter­ested when I was ready. But af­ter two months of pa­tience, we got to­gether. While it would have been eas­ier to say yes the first time and seal the deal, I was glad I was hon­est.” – Mandy*, 25

“I got tired of wait­ing for him to make things of­fi­cial”

“My now-boyfriend and I started off as good friends. He was so at­ten­tive – de­liv­er­ing ice cream and mak­ing me gifts for Valen­tine’s Day – it felt like we were in a re­la­tion­ship, only we never talked about it. It was con­fus­ing, and I was get­ting fed up. When he asked to join me on a solo trip, I snapped and asked him what was go­ing on. Turns out, he was afraid of hurt­ing our friend­ship. My con­fronta­tion mo­ti­vated him to give a proper re­la­tion­ship a shot.” – Char­lotte*, 30

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