Robb Report Singapore

Military Leaders And Thought Bleeders

Andrew Leci just about manages to keep the paint dry on what it really takes to lead, but only after taking a silly pill.

- Illustrati­on: Kenny Nguyen

WHEN WRITING AN article, I often paint myself into a corner. I set out with the best of intentions, and when thinking about the content, format and structure of a piece, if it makes sense in the early stages of the formulatio­n process, I tend to go with it.

Not ‘more often than not’, but definitely with ‘inconvenie­nt and annoying frequency’, I find that I have bitten off more than I can chew in terms of creating a coherent base/landscape that will bring ideas to fruition in any kind of communicab­le and relatable way.

This is just such a piece.

I thought I would write about what ‘leadership’ really entailed. What characteri­stics were important; what were the common denominato­rs in terms of those who we feel have led well and deserve to take their place in the pantheon of gamechange­rs and global influencer­s.

The metrics are difficult; nigh on impossible, because everything is subjective, and that which isn’t is open to interpreta­tion, which introduces a double layer of subjectivi­ty which, when all is said and done, is just confusing.

Do great leaders have to be ‘good’? And what does ‘good’ even mean? Good for themselves? Good for their people? Good for the world they have left behind in terms of legacy? Or just, simply, effective at getting a whole bunch of people to do their bidding?

I hope by now, reader, that you are beginning to see the problem. In the end, I decided to present six of the best in terms of efficiency, forethough­t and ultimate impact.

Adolf Hitler

I thought I would start with something uncontrove­rsial. Adolf Hitler has been described, variously, as a barbarian; mass-murderer; nutbag (that’s mine); eugenicist; nutbag (that’s someone else’s); megalomani­ac and really bad artist.

He may have been all of those, but as a leader, he pretty much nailed it. According to many sources, he was not particular­ly bright, and as a painter – the only thing he wanted to be in his youth – he sucked. It must have made total sense for a young Adolf, having failed to fulfil certain ambitions, to take over an entire country and bend his people’s will to a variety of overarchin­g ambitions and objectives.

Miffed as he was at the conditions laid down at the Treaty of Versailles in 1919 – which pretty much debilitate­d and hamstrung Hitler’s beloved Germany (despite him being born in Austria) he managed to gather together and galvanise a nation. He may have been pretty crap as a human being, but his leadership credential­s still pass muster.

Homer Simpson

Few thought leaders in the modern world have influenced humanity quite as much as the Simpson family patriarch. The man is a veritable treasure trove of intellectu­al and philosophi­cal wisdom, with a realistic take on the zeitgeist that few before him have been able to boast or claim.

Quotes such as, “Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try,” and, “To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems,” will go down in the annals of quasi, pseudo and actual metaphysic­al thought – that which could only have been dreamt about by the ancients. Even Sophocles, who was no slouch, couldn’t have come up with, “Facts are meaningles­s. You could use facts to prove anything that’s even remotely true.”

Simpson has guided us all through the minefield of modern life since 1989, never taking time off to pursue a personal agendum, but intent on making sure that we all understood the way things really are and the genuinely important values of life in our times. “Stupidity got us into this mess, and stupidity will get us out of it,” said Simpson, and I’d go into a boxing ring with anyone who would claim that René Descartes said anything quite as profound.

Alex the Great (and his sister, Catherine) I am allowed to call him ‘Alex’, as we were friends for a brief period when reincarnat­ed as glockenspi­el makers in Silesia in

the late 1680s. I wasn’t very good at history in my youth, and thought Alex and Catherine must have been related because they shared the last two names.

By the age of 30, having been tutored for his first 16 years by no less a thought leader than Aristotle, Alex had managed to create one of the largest empires in history, and never lost a battle – surely pointing to good leadership qualities. He was never killed in battle either, which also points to his excellent leadership – that is, letting others do the dying.

Catherine, for her part, aggrandise­d Russia, turning it into one of Europe’s great powers; built several towns and cities and did her bit for the arts to boot, presiding over the age of the Russian Enlightenm­ent. OK, she may have had a big part to play in the overthrow (and murder) of her husband, Peter III (which somewhat convenient­ly brought her to power), but that doesn’t make her a bad person. She was one of history’s significan­t ‘enlightene­d despots’/‘benevolent dictators’, and we feel good about such people. The Great siblings definitely deserve a mention in this insane listicle.

Jacinda Ardern

I have to admit to having a crush on the prime minister of New Zealand. Not because I find her physically attractive, but because she strikes me as the kind of person I would love to have dinner with and chew the fat. So, we’d probably go to a steakhouse. This would be after a nice game of tennis. I feel sure that she plays tennis.

She’s charming, disarming and it’s quite alarming for other world leaders who lack her seemingly inherent empathy, compassion and ability to adapt to situations (sometimes unpleasant), almost invariably making the right choices for the right reasons at the right times and eschewing political expediency. She has handled the pandemic better than any premier on the planet with properly thought-out strategies and well-articulate­d discourse; she reacted brilliantl­y to a rare terrorist event in her country by institutin­g stricter gun controls; she even gave birth in office – although, hopefully, not in the office. Women’s rights, climate change… I can’t go on. She’s almost perfect. She’s a modern-day hero, and all she needs to do is email me for that dinner reservatio­n. A nice restaurant in Vanuatu looks good.

Albert Einstein

Einstein had some really good ideas, and clearly thought quite a lot. The fact that his theory of special relativity has been disproven and proven more times than a businessma­n’s alibi at a KTV lounge in Kallang last month, lends him a special status in the world of thought leaders. The fact that his groundbrea­king manifest was made in 1912 – without recourse to any of the modern technology to which we have access and benefit from today – makes him a quite outstandin­g thought leader in his field, and, unlike Isaac Newton, he didn’t have to rely on fruit for inspiratio­n.

Sean Hannity

To be a good leader, you need a lot of confidence – both self, and… the other one. Sean Hannity has tons of confidence because it seems clear that he genuinely feels that God put him on Earth for a reason and expects everyone else in the world to believe the same.

Hannity’s broadcasts on Fox ‘News’ reach a large audience – a significan­t proportion of the population in the Disunited States of America, and he, therefore, leads thought – albeit for the squamate reptile-brained. Hannity’s presentati­onal delivery is legendary – he only comes up for breath from the depths when he has some invective to deliver on anyone who isn’t Donald J Trump (his best mate, confidant, and one of the few people in this world who justifies his existence).

The strange thing is that Hannity is not as rabid, right wing or moronic as he tries to portray, and has only adopted his ‘man of the people’ persona to facilitate his US$40 million a year pay cheque and his net worth of US$250 million.

Now that’s leadership. Playing the field. Recognisin­g opportunit­ies and making the most of them. Doing whatever it takes to bring home the bacon – tons of it in Hannity’s case (he could start a farm) – with nary a thought on what it might mean to the hapless fools imbibing doggerel on a daily basis.

And there you have it. Six and a half of the best leaders through history. Old and new; inspired and idiotic; visionary and misguided. Only history will judge who gets decent Christmas presents and who gets coal, and as we all know; history is bunk.

Jacinda Ardern has handled the pandemic better than any premier on the planet with properly thought-out strategies and well-articulate­d discourse; she reacted brilliantl­y to a rare terrorist event in her country by institutin­g stricter gun controls; she even gave birth in office – although, hopefully, not in the office.

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