TheInsider

Enough to give you a fit when you spot a glass

A COLLEAGUE of the Insider recently went to a company after his car was broken into, to have his window replaced. As if the ordeal of having a smashed car window was not enough, the specialist company added insult to vitreous injury.

The injury occurred on Saturday night. He took his car in on Monday. The company had no stock of a common make of car window. He returned the next day after it had been ordered — but it turned out to be for a different car. The specialist company then ordered more glass. The colleague waited. An hour later the driver returned with the glass — but for the wrong door. So he waited again, this time for two hours, because the driver had to go to Germiston — but no one had mentioned there was no glass in Germiston either! The colleague has decided that with the balmy weather Joburg is enjoying at the moment, it’s easier to go glassless.

In the palme of his hand

FRENCH President François Hollande has had an uphill fight at home to retain an honourable place in the popularity rankings. His government is under remorseless fire about France’s struggling economy and stubbornly high unemployment.

Yet the brainy Socialist is respected and seemingly liked by French citizens living abroad, to judge by his reception in SA. His address to his compatriots on Monday evening at the French ambassador’s residence in Pretoria went down well, judging by the rapt attention paid to his elegant yet informative and informal speech, delivered without notes. About 300 French and francophone guests were there. Many of them sang La Marseillaise and then mobbed him politely as he made his way by foot through the crowd, pausing to chat with pretty much anyone who looked keen to chat to him.

His two jokes from the podium went down well. One fact mentioned frequently during the two-day state visit here was the current 4-1 ratio in bilateral trade, in France’s favour. He said he and President Jacob Zuma had agreed to look at this but added: “When I say our trade relationship is unbalanced I mean it’s unbalanced for SA, not for France.” Pause. “For once!” Hollande praised the work of French public servants abroad, whether in embassies, consulates, Alliances Françaises or lycées, saying that although people at home queried the high cost of maintaining large numbers of expatriates, they were worth it. Since many in his audience fitted the same expat profile, his message went down well. Then he looked at the ambassador’s splendid floodlit residence, rising above the manicured gardens, and told the current incumbent, Elisabeth Barbier, how fortunate she was. “We will discuss this issue later,” he told her with mock sternness, to more laughter. So all in all, a très super evening.