Actively resorting to Maldives adventures
• Lying on the beach is always an option — once you’re done snorkelling, diving, paddleboarding and meditating
On most tropical islands, the day’s activities are pleasingly predictable: snorkelling, diving, swimming and drinking cocktails served in coconut shells.
If that’s all you require, the nonstop action at Club Med Kani in the Maldives can feel rather disconcerting. I was doubting the enforced jollity of zumba classes, aqua aerobics, sunset yoga, cookery lessons, a stage show every evening and a disco until the tiny hours.
But on the second day I found myself checking the noticeboard to see what was on the agenda – and not just so I could avoid it.
Club Med used to run notorious party resorts for the young and wild, but the company has spent the past decade preening its image to move upmarket. Its once free and single customers now have kids in tow, so the focus has switched to affluent families and active couples.
The Kani resort in Malé Atoll has relaunched after a revamp and the addition of a children’s activity centre. Yet even as a solo, kid-free older client who’s cynical about rah-rah entertainment, I had a fabulous time.
You cannot not love the Maldives if you’re at all keen on the ocean. Its 26 ring-shaped atolls are made up of more than 1,000 coral islands with gorgeous beaches and blue coves. They sit in the most amazing turquoise waters, so clear you can see the bottom and swim for hours in the lukewarm waves.
I was out snorkelling as soon as I’d dumped my bags, joining one of the free twice-daily boat excursions. I saw a turtle and lots of colourful fish, although the coral has been bleached in many areas as global warming turns the Indian Ocean’s temperature up too high.
I tried stand-up paddleboarding too, despite my appalling lack of balance. The instructor showed me what to do, and tied my leg to the board so I wouldn’t lose it. After a wobbly start I stood up and paddled out to investigate a darker patch where deeper waters lay. I was so enamoured with my newfound skill that a speedboat eventually had to whizz out to catch me and a concerned crew member asked me to stay closer to the shore.
Braver souls can try flyboarding, a hoverboard contraption propelled by water jets so powerful you can rise up to 15m above the sea. Two dreadlocked brothers run the operation and spend their days performing somersaults and swoops above the water.
One evening — while guests enjoyed a gourmet dinner on the beach — the brothers performed acrobatics in the dark, their movements illuminated by jazzy lights on their wetsuits. A suckling pig was the buffet’s centrepiece and food stations stretched along the shore so nobody had to do anything as downmarket as queue for food.
Kani is staffed by a cheerful crew of GOs – “gentils organisateurs” — who make sure the
GM – “gentils membres”, the guests — are having fun.
The polyglot gang comes from more than 20 countries, with Dany, a professionally charming Haitian, in charge of watersports; Lorenzo, from Mauritius, overseeing snorkelling; a South African teaching yoga and chefs from Japan, China, India, Italy and France in charge of various food stations in the Velhi restaurant. The food was delicious, and if you tire of buffets, you can order à la carte at a beach-side eatery.
Club Med resorts offer continuous food and drink for an allinclusive price and most activities are free. Sometimes they’re a little short – a 30-minute yoga session isn’t long enough to get your “ohmm” on, and 45 minutes of snorkelling in a chaperoned group just leaves you wanting more.
There’s always music drifting on the breeze, whether it’s the pounding beat of the zumba sessions or the background music of restaurants and bars.
One evening the versatile staff performed the songs from Grease — at the resort, there’s no time for an employee to have a bad-mood day.
Later, the bartenders positioned glasses all around the large circular bar, ready for “domino shooters”.
After a lively countdown, hundreds of glasses of colourful booze tipped neatly into bigger glasses of water for a soft landing, and were quickly scooped out and downed by cheering party animals.
If you want solitude, the long, fine, sandy beaches have plenty of space and each beach bedroom has a patio and a personal strip of sand. At one end of the island are posher villas raised on stilts above the water, with a clubhouse that serves champagne every evening.
The Maldives is a long way from SA, but the first fellow tourists I chatted to were from
I WAS SO ENAMOURED WITH MY NEWFOUND SKILL THAT A SPEEDBOAT EVENTUALLY HAD TO WHIZZ OUT TO CATCH ME
Joburg. As older parents, they’d booked the elite Finolhu Villas on Gasfinolhu Island, a fiveminute boat whizz from the main resort. Guests there can join all the activities at Kani but catch the last boat home for a tranquil sleep.
The two islands are 35 minutes from the small and efficient Malé International Airport, where you walk out of the main entrance and cross the road to the jetty.
Tourists are met by a fleet of boats rather than a fleet of taxis, which instantly makes a holiday feel quite magical.
The only terrestrial excursion from Kani is a tour of Malé, one of the smallest capitals in the world. Other than that, you stay in the resort, which is why Club Med is so eager to keep its customers entertained and coming back for more.
Parents can leave their kids with staff who will entertain them with all-day water sports, arts and crafts and beach games. Older kids can play soccer and volleyball, kayak and dance, and there’s a full gym and an excellent spa for adults.
My 80-minute massage by a Balinese therapist started and ended with ginger tea and was punctuated by exuberant birdsong. Once done, I walked towards my bedroom past the large swimming pool just as the zumba dancers started. If I hadn’t been so sleepy from the massage, I swear I would have joined them.