Sweating it out in Canada – despite the cold

BEFORE setting off on my Canadian trip, I watched the weather reports with some trepidation. Temperatures regularly dropped to minus 10ºC in Calgary, with a midday balmy spell when the thermometer sometimes rose right up to zero or even minus 2ºC. I looked through my Cape Town wardrobe and found nothing suitable for those conditions, so I determined to get myself some proper Arctic gear once I got here.

It hasn’t been necessary at all, although the early morning temperature is regularly below freezing point. I have managed so far with a thin sweater and my regular scooter jacket. In fact, most of the time I have been too hot.

I go for long walks in downtown Calgary in minus 2ºC weather and find myself having to unzip my jacket to stop sweating.

There’s definitely something different about Canadian temperatures.

Some years ago, a nurse from Ocean View told me she always bought her meat from Checkers because “they have bigger kilograms there”.

No matter how much I tried to explain about the size of kilograms, she insisted she had tried out other shops’ kilograms and they were definitely not as big as the Checkers ones.

I’m beginning to wonder whether Calgary has warmer degrees than those we’re used to back in Cape Town.

In a country like Canada, everything is artificially heated as a matter of course.

Every building has a sort of “engine room” where a furnace constantly issues warm air that’s distributed through the rooms.

The flat where I’m staying has warm air sneaking out through the skirting boards, and when I sit on the tiled kitchen floor for my early-morning communication session with the two resident cats, Vacek and Oboe, my bottom remains quite warm in spite of my thin pyjamas because the floor is heated.

The foyer of the apartment block is kept uncomfortably warm, and every time I go into a shop or restaurant, I have to strip down to shirtsleeves or sit panting and sweating.

Maybe a lot of this heat spills out into the streets and warms the whole city.

I suppose there’s no real need to worry about wasted energy in a country that’s powered by plentiful hydroelectric schemes. There’s certainly not much likelihood of rolling power shedding here.

The one thing I miss about South African buildings is their relative quietness. Here in North America, you are seldom far away from the hum and hiss of fans or furnaces.

Because most windows are kept shut in winter, there are extractor fans whirring quietly, humidifiers, air purifiers and bathroom ventilator fans all adding to the general “voice” of the building.

It’s going to be a bit unnerving to get back to my quiet house, where all the sounds are from outside.

Two golfers were walking down the fairway when a funeral procession passed by.

The one stopped, took off his cap, and stood reverently as the hearse went by.

Afterwards his companion said: “That was a nice gesture, paying your respects to a passing funeral.”

“Yeah,” said the first player, “we would have been married for 20 years next month.”