Parents must espouse solid values to kids
THERE are many reasons why women experience abuse; ironically, the historic reasons remain similar.
For example, most people struggle to understand their own behaviour, yet they “expect” to understand others’. A lack of understanding oneself leads to decision-making based on ignorance and conceit.
Most folk make emotive decisions regarding marriage, which is perhaps the start of the problem.
In the era of prophets, Moses, Jesus etc, the institute of marriage was respected. “Living together” was improper and social norms were established. Even Mary the mother of Jesus, the Messiah, needed divine intervention to explain her pregnancy. An angel explained to Joseph that Mary was blessed by the Creator and Jesus spoke as an infant to explain his mother’s uniqueness. Without a charge from Joseph and with the infant Jesus speaking, the Rabbis/Pharisees could not kill Saint Mary.
Today, many people live as they please. Kids grow up estranged, while their fathers refuse liability.
Usually kids in such a caustic milieu evolve into unfulfilled teens and adults as the psych-spiritual setting is partial. Unless the custodial parent has solid spiritual values, problems increase. In a world where alcohol, drugs and promiscuity are promoted as mainstream values, the family suffers.
Teenagers tested by a milieu that promotes self-destruction often seek solace amid their “own”; this includes those similarly “broken” by historic shortfalls.
The damaging behaviour thus recreates itself. A quality partnership requires a huge effort including spiritual, psychological, physical and material well-being of both. If one is weak, the other must be stronger.
Studies suggest that a relationship based on obvious failings are doomed unless the other accepts that failing. Some men do not have the emotional or spiritual aptitude to manage themselves, yet some women are eager to marry them.
Parents must teach their offspring how to identify spiritual and emotional values, including inner – and not just outward, “transient” beauty.
CLLR YAGYAH ADAMS Cape Muslim Congress