PUMPKIN ON CAT’S MENU?

WE CITY folk consider ourselves under constant threat from crooks, muggers, politicians and other thieves and take all kinds of measures to protect ourselves from the baddies.

We sign up with security companies, install burglar alarm systems, fit strong locks on our doors and install floodlights in our backyards.

We often say we envy the “peace and tranquillity” of rural life, but fail to realise that farm life can also be a constant battle with baddies.

Jackals, stock thieves and lynxes steal sheep, birds damage fruit crops and hawks steal chickens. Wild pigs eat whole sheep, barely bothering to spit out the bones.

On the family farm in the Karoo they were recently bothered by a porcupine in the vegetable garden, so they set a cage trap and baited it with a few chunks of pumpkin.

Next morning when they went to inspect the trap there was a very angry lynx in it. Why would a big cat show a fatal attraction for pumpkin?

While trying to find an answer, the farmer remembered a worker called Banzi who had kept a cat and declared that he fed it on pumpkin.

Banzi was considered something of a joker and the other staff members mocked him for his ridiculous claim. A pumpkin-eating cat? Ridiculous!

Now they’re not so sure. Banzi is no longer with us, but lynxes belong to the cat family and if a lynx goes after pumpkin, maybe a domestic cat would do the same, they think.

In the interests of research I ask cat-owning readers whether any have noticed their pet’s predilection for pumpkin. It might reduce the monthly pet-food bill. I shall be starting my cats’ trial pumpkin diet soon after my next visit to the supermarket.

As a side issue, the farmer and his staff are now planning a pilgrimage to the local cemetery, where Banzi’s remains are buried, to offer their belated apologies to his spirit for mocking his beliefs about feline nutrition.

Last Laugh

A WOMAN said to her husband: “The car won’t start. I think there’s water in the carburettor.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” said her husband. “You don’t even know what a carburettor is.”

“I still think there’s water in the carburettor,” insisted the woman.

“Well let me have a look at it and see what the problem really is,” the husband said grumpily.

“Where have you parked the car?”

“It’s in the swimming pool.”