What it costs to get sent off in style
Along with luxury cemeteries, plush funerals sound like lavish weddings and they don’t come cheap, but some South Africans can and do pay
A bar area with gold taps and alcohol, plush seating in a VIP marquee, a kiddie area, hostesses in matching gowns, designer clothes, luxury cars and, for some, even a helicopter.
It may sound like a lavish wedding, but the reality is more sombre: South Africans are bringing bling to bespoke funerals to send off their loved ones in style.
Event coordinators and funeral parlours say grieving families are splashing out tens of thousands of rand to set up posh funerals at cemeteries in cordoned-off areas between graves.
Chief operating officer at the Tshwane-based Brothers and Sisters funeral home, Sello Aphane, said their bespoke funeral packages ranged from R30,000 to R150,000, and could include a video and photographic package complete with drone footage.
“Our target is rich people and celebrities. We offer the best services and give posh funerals. We don’t bury, we lay our loved ones to rest,” said Aphane.
The funeral home, which offers a fleet of luxury hearses and family cars including RollsRoyces, Ferraris and Porsches, also gives clients a choice of colour schemes and dress themes for the male and female ushers, as well as a bar service and a DJ.
He said those were in response to client requests, but that they weren’t very common requests.
The home hosted a funeral in April where all its staff wore nautical outfits.
“The clothes we wear and the cars we drive are all part of taking care of our clients. We offer personalised funerals in order to send people off in style,” he said.
Lucia Masango said she and her family were “awed” by her father’s nautical-themed funeral in Gauteng recently.
“They dropped us off in one outfit [at the hall] and went to change for the cemetery. When they came back they were wearing those white army things [sailor outfits].
“When my dad got married in 1996 he wore something similar, but they didn’t know that and I was shocked. I wasn’t even crying at my dad’s funeral, I was celebrating him,” said Masango.
Masango said she was touched by the little things that were offered at her dad’s funeral, from Ferrero Rocher chocolates to biltong snacks.
“When the casket was lowered into the ground, the director stood up and everyone dressed in white [the ushers] came to my mom, and they did a guard of honour. It was as if the president was arriving or something,” said Masango.
“I didn’t expect what was at my dad’s funeral; it was the first time we had a funeral at home, and my dad was buried like a king.
“When we went to the cemetery, everyone kept asking if we were burying a king, and he deserved it because he had worked so hard.”
She said the family had spent about R85,000 on the funeral.
When Sabelo Gumede lost his dad, Chief Gumede, he was in the process of planning a wedding. He said the service and decor he received from the Pietermaritzburg-based funeral parlour, Induduzo Funeral Home, exceeded what he had planned for the wedding.
“I was planning a wedding before he died. It was known in the community that the Gumedes would be having a wedding, and then this happened. The funeral exceeded what we had planned for the wedding, from the cars to the casket to how the marshals were all dressed up,” he said.
He said they had spent about R60,000, which included a marquee, chairs and throne-styled seats for the family, floral displays and snacks.
Another mourner, who did not want to be named, said his family had spent R150,000 on a funeral for a “prominent” KwaZulu-Natal person through the Induduzo Funeral Home.
“We got the platinum package which included a helicopter flight carrying the coffin to the cemetery, designer clothes for our uncle, designer clothes for the immediate family as well as makeup and grooming.
“The cemetery was laid out in style with flowers and a stunning marquee. We didn’t mind spending the money because he was a special man who lived in style, and we thought it fitting that he be buried in the same way that he lived.”
Phumlani Njilo, Induduzo director, said bespoke funerals were tailormade in response to requests or briefs from their clients.
“People are very competitive, and we have had clients call us and say we went to this funeral and we saw you had this for them. We want that and something a bit more lavish.”
George Mollo, owner of Kopano Events, has teamed up with funeral parlours in Gauteng to offer their clients a VIP experience. For a fee of between R4,000 and R11,000, depending on sizes, Mollo sets up a marquee complete with leather couches, flooring, bottled water and baked goods, all for the family.
“I approached a few undertakers about upgrading the grave site setup to be more than just chair covers because funerals need to be about celebrating our loved ones and giving them a sendoff they deserve,” said Mollo.
Mollo said there were some people who thought the graveside setup was “over the top”, but he said his clients believed the send-off was fitting for their loved ones.
Tshepang Motaung, 62, said the funeral “felt like a perfect symbol of my pain” when she buried her partner in July.
“It’s funny because I am a traditional healer, and when I got to the cemetery I was wowed.
“I felt that my partner was buried in a dignified manner. I was excited and proud of myself and him as well, it was so nice. The decor was red and white, and that for me symbolised my pain, it was as if they felt my pain,” explained Motaung.
She said she got more than she expected for her R130 monthly fee with Mpoky’s funeral parlour.
Her setup included white leather couches, flooring and a marquee. She added that she saw nothing wrong in celebrating loved ones by going the extra mile.
“Don’t just bury someone for the sake of burying them. When a child is born we see it as a blessing from God, and Christians say when some dies, they have been taken by God because it was their time. When a child is born we celebrate, so when a person leaves this earth after working hard you also need to celebrate them. It brings us dignity,” said Motaung.
Her sentiments on bespoke funerals are shared by the National Funeral Directors Association, who said as service providers it was important to give clients what they wanted.
“People talk about funerals and the cost – but what about weddings? People don’t say weddings cost x-amount. Yes, it’s tradition and we have been following tradition and culture for many, many years, but we as funeral directors need to move with the times,” said PR officer Manesh Govender.
“If a client comes to you and tells you they want something then we need to provide it because we are service providers. If we don’t go they will go to someone else.” –
People always talk about funerals and the cost – but what about weddings? People don’t say weddings cost x-amount