Are your kids of the four-legged kind? A pet pre-nup is for you
Under the dispassionate eye of divorce law, dogs are considered “chattels unlike children, the court won’t decide where it is in their best interests to live postsplit they are simply treated as shared goods. But, as a raft of celebrity break-ups has highlighted, it’s no good packing up the terrier along with the broken radio alarm and the back copies of Wired.
While a Marie Kondo-style decluttering of possessions may be welcome, almost nobody wants to say goodbye to their beloved pets.
This week, actress Christina Hendricks split with her husband, actor Geoffrey Arend. They released a charmingly optimistic joint statement: “We will always be grateful for the love we’ve shared, and will always work together to raise our two beautiful dogs.”
It’s a lovely thought but there’s generally only one person shrugging on a coat at 10pm and heading into a howling gale to supervise wee-wees and that’s the one who gets the residency order. The ex might get the occasional visit for a cuddle, but they’re also not going to benefit from the joy of pets.
When I split up with my ex, I got custody of our two rickety old cats, and their presence has been a delight. My current partner and I now share a spaniel, and I can’t imagine the agonising tug of love, should we split hence, we can’t.
In the first flush of love many couples opt for a puppy instead
often overlooking the fact that dogs live about 14 years, longer than many ill-fated marriages.
Committed to their rainbow family of multiple canines are Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux. When they broke up there was talk of shared custody of their four dogs, but, with Jennifer in LA and Justin in New York, regular Sunday visits proved impossible. However, when Dolly (living with Jennifer) died recently, the couple “reunited to mourn”, with Justin posting a picture of them together at the dog’s funeral.
Not everyone is as amicable which is why some couples demand prenups for pets.
Lawyer Jennifer Curtis says: “We’re seeing a growing number of divorce cases where people are arguing over the future of their pets. A third of pet owners think animals should be treated the same as children when it comes to break-ups, but the law doesn’t agree.”
A pet prenup is a wise move, she advises. “It deals with common issues like ownership and arrangements for future care, providing certainty in case the parties separate.”
But while A-listers like Johnny Depp and Amber Heard were able to work out who got custody of Pistol (dog, rather than item), thanks to their legal teams, those of us with less cash are left to work it out between ourselves. “Dogs are very connected with humans,” says Sue McCabe, a dog behaviourist. “They read our emotions and understand if we’re stressed. If the person who is leaving the family home is their primary carer, it can be very upsetting. Like us, they grieve and will feel depressed.”
And just as divorcing adults are urged to be amicable for the sake of the children, McCabe adds: “Whatever the circumstances, I would urge people to be mindful of the dog, and avoid shouting. Make sure the dog is kept busy and try to do something every day that makes them happy.”
Make sure the dog is kept busy