Heartbreak of Bulls flanker
Bulls flank Abongile Nonkontwana has told the heartbreaking story of how the first rugby game his father watched him playing was also the last.
The 25-year-old Eastern Capeborn player recently returned to the Bulls after a stint with the Cheetahs in the Guinness PRO14, where he tested himself against European clubs.
“My father watched the first rugby match I played. It was also the last rugby match he saw me play‚ because he died soon afterwards‚” the powerful Bulls loose forward said. “My father is the reason I fell in love with rugby.”
Nonkontwana said it was his goal to follow in the footsteps of his father, whom he regarded as his hero.
“I was completely lost after his death. I wanted to be like him. This was the first year of my life [when he died] that I was spending just with him and playing rugby like him‚” he said.
“I struggled to come to terms with his death. I had no male role models in the house.
“It was just my mom and a younger sister. I suffered from depression after my dad’s death.”
Nonkontwana said moving from his mother’s home to stay with his rugby-playing father at 10 had inspired him to become the player he is today.
“I grew up with my mother in Grahamstown [Makhanda] and with my father working in East London. I used to only see him on weekends or during the holidays‚” he said.
“When I turned 10‚ my parents decided I should move in with my dad in East London because the schools were better there.
“I remember being excited because I would now be able to spend more time with my dad. He was a rugby player and some of my earliest memories are of watching him training.”
His parents applied for him to attend Selborne Primary.
Nonkontwana has never forgotten his interview with the headmaster, who “took one look at me and said, ‘We’ll accept you on one condition — that you play rugby’.
“Before I’d only played tennis and soccer.”
On the day of his first rugby game he crossed his fingers that bad weather would not stop the match so that he could play in front of his father.
“I remember it was raining terribly on the morning of the match‚” he recalled. “My father said there was no way the game would go ahead‚ but I begged him to double check for me. Sure enough‚ it went ahead. I think we won that match. It was against Queen’s.
“I remember how happy my dad was as we drove home. He looked so happy that I was playing rugby and enjoying it just as much as he did. He was really happy for me. That’s the only game of rugby he saw me play. He died of pneumonia shortly afterwards.
“My rugby was still progressing well. From Selborne Primary I went to Selborne College for grade 8‚ 9 and 10.
“When I made the Border Craven Week U13 team and the Border Grant Khomo Week U16 team‚ I started to get offers from other schools and teams. I knew nothing about how offers in rugby worked‚ but fortunately I had some good people around me helping me make those decisions.”