How to make stress your friend
New studies suggest that we can turn stress into a good thing. A phenomenal TED talk by a US psychologist explains how it works, writes Researchers tracked 30 000 US adults and found that those who reported high levels of stress, which they believed was bad for them, were indeed more likely to die in that period.
But those who had high levels of stress, and didn’t believe stress was harmful, were unaffected.
McGonigal looked at another Harvard study which proved that where people were taught to interpret classic stress signs – sweaty palms, pounding heart, shaky voice – as performance-boosting natural aides, their confidence rose.
A final study on oxytocin was enough to utterly change her mind.
Oxytocin, known as the “cuddle hormone”, is actually produced in stressful situations. If we follow our hormonal instinct, stress can actually help us to build relationships.
McGonigal’s conclusions are jaw-dropping.
“When you choose to view your stress response as helpful, you create the biology of courage and when you choose to connect with others under stress, you can create resilience,” she says.
So is it really that simple? If we stop stressing about stress itself, we can protect ourselves from harm?
“Kelly is not actually saying anything that we haven’t known for the past 20 years,” says Dr Keith Gaynor, a senior clinical psychologist.
Gaynor says that the core of cognitive behaviour therapy – a key tool for psychologists – is the idea that what we think influences how we feel.
“It is not what happens to us, but how we think about what happens to us, that is important,” he says.
“So if I said to you, you are going to spend the next 12 hours in hospital, and there’ll be lots of pain and drugs and you’ll have a terrible time, you’d be terrified.
“But if you knew you were going into hospital to have a baby, and that something positive was going to come out of it, you’d think about it in a different way.”
Everyone’s stress triggers are different, but responses are the same: your heart-rate goes up, your blood pressure increases, your breathing quickens, blood is pumped away from your stomach and into your hands and feet. This is why you feel shaky and a bit nauseous.
The first step, says Gaynor, is to notice how our thoughts are increasing our stress. A classic example is if you have a work presentation you’re afraid might go badly. You might immediately jump to the worst-case scenario – that is, that you might lose your job.
“Often our fantasy of what’s going to happen is much worse than the reality,” says Gaynor. “So you need to check your fears against the reality.”
Secondly, we can be aware of our thoughts without reacting to then. We can choose to get wound up with anxiety or do something positive for ourselves – like prepare properly.
“That’s where being mindful is useful,” he adds. “Mindfulness is about the here and now and not getting lost in the future.”
If it sounds difficult, it is – but practice should help.
“You’ve got to practise those positive thoughts every time you feel anxious,” he says.
“You can learn to deal well with stress. There are very few people who can’t do it.” – Irish Independent