‘I feel like a failure as a mother’
THE MOTHER of 11-year-old Onkarabetse Thole, who drowned in a large pool of water that was caused by a burst pipe on the main waterline near Riemvasmaak in Galeshewe, was left engulfed in self-blame as she recalled the fateful day.
Miriam Thole spoke with haste this week as she relayed the details of what happened on Sunday, September 11, hours before her son died.
Her eyes were barely blinking as she told her story and it appeared that she did not want to leave out any detail.
Miriam recalls that she and her children had enjoyed a relaxing Sunday afternoon at home after they had returned from church.
“We had returned from church and I wanted to sleep, however, I was unable to sleep. The children - Onkarabetse, his 16-year-old brother and their friend - were outside in the yard playing. They came to me and told me that they were going to get firewood for the granny. I came out of the house and told my 16-year-old that they should be careful. I even told the boys that they should not carry too much wood and that the grandmother can use paraffin at night,” she recalled.
“As they were walking out of the yard, I again told them that I was going to sit outside and wait for them as they had to go with me to the house where I normally charge my cellphone. I told them that they should return fast as I need to charge my cellphone in order to set the alarm in order to wake them up for school the next day. We do not have electricity here in Riemvasmaak, so many people use firewood or paraffin or even both to cook. The boys left and I remained sitting outside the house waiting for them.”
Miriam said she began to get a bit anxious as the hours passed.
“I sat and kept looking in the direction that they went into the bushes to see whether I could spot them from afar. I could not see them and decided to continue waiting. I calmed myself and said that maybe there is load shedding at the house where I want to charge my phone and I might be in a hurry for nothing.”
She said she later heard screams, which made her feel uneasy.
“I heard some screaming from the bushes at about 2pm that afternoon. I got up and headed in the direction where the screaming came from. As I was running into the veld, I saw my 16-yearold son walking towards me. He had Onkarabetse’s clothes in his hands. I did not see Onkarabetse with my teenage son. I feared for the worst and I ran back to get my 19-year-old son.
“My 19-year-old son and I then ran into the bushes. It felt like I was running to a destination that was located very far. I felt like I was not able to reach the place we were running to or that my legs were too slow. However, I continued running as the urgency I felt in my heart grew stronger and it was pushing me to keep going, although it felt like I was running for an eternity.
“As I was running, I saw puddles of water on the ground. I kept running until we reached the manhole.”
Miriam paced up and down at the scene and repeatedly screamed her son’s name.
“I saw the water in the manhole. The water was bubbling like water that was boiling. I walked up and down and screamed ‘Onkarabetse, Onkarabetse’. However, there was no response and I did not even see any trace of him under the water. I felt like jumping into the water, but my legs were feeling lame. I then screamed my son’s name again, yet there was still nothing.”
She said the incident has left her feeling like a failure as a parent.
“While I was there, the police asked whether I was able to get home as they alerted the divers to assist. My neighbours walked back home with me while we waited for news from the police. I sat in front of the door and waited for news about whether my child’s body had been retrieved. This whole incident has made me feel like I am a failure as a mother … maybe my son would have still been alive had I not let them assist the granny.
“This incident has also scarred my 16-year-old son deeply. He does not talk much anymore. He jumped into the water twice in an attempt to save his brother. He said Onkarabetse said, ‘Chief, let me go’ as my 16-year-old struggled to save him. I have lost a son and got another one who is struggling to come to terms with this incident.”
Miriam said they received the news at 9pm on Sunday evening that the body of her son was retrieved from the canal.
By Wednesday afternoon, the stormwater canal where Onkarabetse drowned had still not been cordoned off.
There were no warning signs at the scene to indicate that the canal is a danger to the community that lives nearby and only a piece of police tape was seen waving in the wind at the side of the manhole to show that there was an incident.