When a subway smells like cheese

CLIPPING one’s nails … a necessary evil, I suppose; and what a luxury! There’s just something special about, after discovering that your claws have – seemingly overnight – grown to an ugly length, feeling them trimmed and tidy again.

I have to admit that, as a man, I cannot understand why some folk either grow their nails or apply synthetic nails. I am not criticising, I am just saying that I don’t understand it. To me, though the attraction may be that it may look fashionable, I just believe that it’s not practical. I am certain that it prevents one from doing many simple, everyday, necessary tasks. One of those jobs involves toilet paper.

Also, Freddy Krueger gave me many sleepless nights, and when I see long nails, my mind immediately travels back to Elm Street.

The invention of the modern day nail-clipper must have been a life-saver. As a youngster, I remember watching old headed? It could either blind you, decapitate you or increase your fibre intake. And personally, I have enough roughage, thank you very much!

And if you thin that’s bad, recently someone sent me a video clip of a passenger on the New York subway having a go at his toenails with a battery-operated nail-grinder. Imagine the air quality in that subway car! Keratin en kaas! I would rather walk, sowaar!

Now I am someone who regularly finds himself watching or reading about hacks to make everyday tasks easier. ‘Hacks’ are those strategies or techniques that people share for managing one’s time or activities more efficiently. I confess, I am a hack-aholic.

The hack that most impressed me this past week was when someone applied strips of sticky tape to either side of their nail-clipper. The result of this simple application is that when nails are clipped, instead of the shards of keratin flying across the room, they fly into the sticky tape on the sides. Afterwards, all you have to do is remove the tape with the offcuts of the nail stuck to them, and discard.

That’s the beauty of hacks; though there’s nothing wrong with nail-clippers, for example, making a tiny, easy tweak makes it work even more efficiently. I bet that if Eugene and Oelestin heard about this they would not be offended. I even suspect they would have nodded their approval.

Then on Monday, I was almost witness to another series of ‘cuts’ when I accompanied someone to the local Post Office, as they needed to get some business done.

Upon entering the building, one becomes aware of the sheer ‘bigness’ of the place. I have been there many times, but it’s always impressive, even intimidating. And that’s what I noticed again on Monday, people just looked lost as they entered. One person cut in ahead of the queue.

People would come in, look around and then walk over to patrons who were already queueing, making enquiries of where the queue starts or which counter is for what service or other general customer service queries. One old lady walked in and went straight to the counter to make her enquiries. Who could blame her?

I must say, the people in the queues were pleasant and helpful. It was heart-warming to watch. I just thought that it was a bit of a pity that – though the staff at the Post Office were helpful, friendly and efficient – there was very little support or guidance for customers before they got to the counters.

Years back I remember that there used to be an enquiries desk where people could make a first stop. I know that at the Home Affairs office in Galeshewe, one is met at the door, a register is filled in and clients are directed where to wait before being served.

Such a service would, I suspect, make things easier for Post Office visitors, seeing as the place can get pretty overcrowded. Knowing where to wait or where to go makes waiting a bit more bearable.

Or failing that, even a few signs above counters or notice boards in the hall with answers to common queries wouldn’t be bad.

Now please note, I need to emphasise that the staff at the Post Office did nothing wrong. It’s just me, I just squirm when people at a service point obviously know their jobs while visitors have to flop around and flounder when a few simple hacks could make a visit pleasant for everyone.

Efficiency in little things could make a big difference; like adding strips of tape to a nail-clipper, a few tiny hacks at businesses could have benefits down the line. South Africans already are seriously frustrated. Making a few tweaks to ease a burden here and there will not be such a bad thing, in my opinion.