ASK SIS DOLLY
Need advice? E-mail sis[email protected] drum.co.za or SMS the keywords SIS DOLLY followed by your question and name to 36489. Each SMS (160 characters) costs R1.
HAD ENOUGH OF IT
I’m a sex worker but I want to stop this business as I’m looking for some peace in my life. Can you help me? LR, SMS
commendable that you’ve realised you need change in your life and have worked out what you need to do to make that change.
There are halfway houses for women who want or need to change their lives and you can get in contact with them through Lovelife on 011-523-1000 or by emailing [email protected]
I wish you the best.
CAN’T MOVE ON COMPLICATIONS
I’m 27 and have two baby girls – or that’s what I thought. My girlfriend of seven years and I broke up just after my first daughter was born and I became serious with another girl, who then also became pregnant.
This second girl offered to help my sister find a boyfriend and hooked her up with someone she knew back in high school. One day after they had a fight, this guy decided to come clean and confessed to my sister that my girlfriend was actually his ex-girlfriend and that they’d still been sleeping together when she was sleeping with me. She only decided to end things with him when she got pregnant. Now I’m wondering who the baby belongs to.
My sister told our parents everything as well, so now my mother wants nothing to do with the baby and her mother. This leaves me stuck between my family and my girlfriend, who insists the baby is mine.
I’m scared to do a paternity test because either way the outcome will be bad – if the test is negative my family will know I’m bringing up someone else’s baby, and if it’s positive they won’t accept the child anyway. What do I do? LP, EMAIL
seem stuck between a rock and a hard place. Maybe you should start by working out what would make you happy instead of thinking about what other people will do or say. Would you be able to continue your life with this woman without knowing whether the child is yours? Could you live without knowing for sure?
I suggest you organise a paternity test – for your own sanity and so you can do the right thing by the child. Your family should stick by you no matter what decision you take.
TO THE WRONG PEOPLE
I seem to attract guys with too much baggage who turn out to be obsessive psychos. I don’t know what it is about me, but it usually starts off with me feeling sorry for a guy. The next thing I know, I’m living with him – not because I’m happy but because I feel sorry for him.
It’s like I want to show these guys that good people do exist, but then they become my problem. I just want to find a good guy who’s normal. What am I doing wrong? WORRIED, EMAIL
seem to have a big heart and unfortunately it’s working against you in your relationships. You mean well, and that should be applauded, but you can’t save the whole world. There comes a time in life when you have to be selfish and look out for number one – you. For you, that time is now. Widen your social circle and engage with different people so you meet a wider variety of men. Then take time to get to know the person and trust your instincts.