YOUR SAY

Choosing motherhood

Lauren Clark’s road to motherhood [June 2018} is almost exactly like mine, with a few differences. I was nearing 40, with no hint of settling down. My mom was the instigator – she spoke to all my friends to get their buy-in before approaching me! Although I had a few friends who were willing to make a ‘donation’, I chose an anonymous donor and went for intrauterine insemination (IUI).

The first three attempts didn’t work, so I ‘fired’ the donor. The next donor was perfect – I found out I was pregnant in October 2010 and somehow I just knew it was a little girl.

I gave birth on 15 June 2011, with my mother and sister in the theatre. I gave my daughter my mom’s name, Cobie. She’s happy and content, and when she asks about a dad, I tell her the truth: I prayed and God gave me a miracle. The support I have from my family and friends is amazing. I moved back home and am a full-time mom, for now. My daughter has strong male role models; she talks about her dads.

My mom passed away three years ago but I’m so blessed that she met Cobie. I see so much of her in my daughter: her looks, her sass, her style. Cobie gave my dad purpose after my mom’s passing. He now has the responsibility of helping to raise a little madam.

Since I made the leap, three women have contacted me saying they also want to do it. I say go for it! It just goes to show: where there is a will, there is a way!

Rhoda Erasmus

Ed: I love the idea that your mum instigated the entire process!

The joy of giving

I’m the type of person who cries while watching TV, whether it’s a happy or sad movie, tragic events on a news channel or during a national anthem at the Olympics. But I generally manage to keep my emotions inside when reading.

Until I read ‘Giving is the New Receiving’ [June 2018] and got to the story about the boy who fully expected to die after donating blood to his sister. What a selfless spirit! Thank you for that article.

Hanni Bazley

Ed: That story always makes me weep… I think it’s the bit about him asking for a day to consider it, then still agreeing to do it.

Not a morning person

I loved reading about Liesl Robertson’s efforts to switch to being a morning person [‘Can you train yourself to be a morning person?’, July 2018]. I’m 60 – and not a morning person. I can be awake at 11pm to 3am, but not voluntarily at 5am. My husband is that morning person. He falls asleep at about 10pm and is awake at five.

Could it have to do with our time of conception, or birth? Perhaps our biological clocks start at that time? Even in our cave years, someone had to stand watch while the morning people slept!

Elsje Meyer

Ed: Don’t give up, Elsje: I transitioned into a morning person in my late thirties – although having small kids probably meant I had no choice!