In the article ‘Yours, mine, ours’ [July, 2018], I was surprised to see that none of the couples shared an account – although I haven’t come across anyone who believes me when I say my husband and I do!
In our second year of marriage, we saw a counsellor. My husband was unemployed at the time, yet he had no debt, whereas I was drowning in debt. We’d been splitting expenses down the middle. She explained that marriage is a union – and if it is, would it not apply to our money too? Shortly after that my husband found work and I began to see the fruits of combining our income. I also learnt that I needed to respect his income and live within my means. His monthly ‘savings’ quickly paid off all my debt, for which I’m very grateful.
Six years later, we still share an account. We also have a savings account. If there’s something expensive that we want to treat ourselves to, we discuss it before shelling out.
Combining our money has taught me to live without some luxuries, and has taught him that it’s okay to spend money on ‘wants’ every now and then. Tamsin Tyson
Ed: That sounds perfectly resolved to me. Money is often a source of resentment – it’s great that you’ve learnt to make it work for you as a couple.