ahead of the game
Named for the Palala river that runs through the Unesco-declared Waterberg Biosphere Reserve in Limpopo, Tintswalo Lapalala is luxury ecotourism at its best. And with only two commercial lodges operating in the entire 48000-hectare game reserve, you basic
there is a knock at the door of my luxury tent. I know that sounds like I’m hallucinating, but there actually is a door.
It’s both my wakeup call for the game drive I signed up for and the delivery of a flask filled with hot water for tea. Tintswalo Lapalala operates off the grid, and as a result there is no kettle in my room, which makes it sound very rustic – it isn’t. Raised above the surrounding bushveld on a wooden deck, my room/tent has a plush king-size bed, a fireplace, an indoor shower, an outdoor bath, laminate flooring and a deck with a private plunge pool. It’s the middle of winter so I might not get to test-drive the pool, but I’m eyeing the outdoor bath.
The reserve has no power lines but the tent still has electricity, which means hot water, air con, lamps, overhead lighting and even a small hairdryer, all running on solar power. Kettles are a no-go though – the element sucks a lot of electricity. I make myself a cup of loose-leaf rooibos (no teabags allowed as they have plastic in them) and get back into bed to stay warm – my phone informs me it is 1°C outside and a small part of me wonders if I shouldn’t just give the game drive a miss.
Then again, I didn’t come all this way (Lapalala is a threeand-a-half-hour drive from Lanseria Airport) to stay under my duvet, tempting as it is.
When I step onto the vehicle I’m handed a blanket,
a hot water bottle (with a leopardprint cover – very on brand) and a waterproof poncho with a fleecy layer inside. This seems like overkill, so I drape the poncho over my legs. (Tip: wear the poncho.)
Dave, our knowledgeable guide, stops intermittently to point out a rare bird (there are 300 different species on the reserve in the summer), measure an elephant track (to work out the size of the elephant, multiply the diameter of the footprint by 3,5 to get its shoulder height) and share titbits about the animals along the way.
Did you know that giraffes have three collective nouns to describe what they are doing? A journey of giraffes means they’re on the move; a tower of giraffes are standing still; and a kaleidoscope describes two males fighting.
I also learn that dassies are hyraxes and therefore closely related to elephants (more so the rock dassies scampering around Table Mountain than the yellow-throated tree dassies we spot en route) and that the grunting I heard near my tent last night was just a male impala. (That’s a relief.) It’s rutting (mating) season, so they spend a lot of time ‘roaring’. It’s hard to describe the unearthly sound – type ‘impala rutting season’ into YouTube and watch a quick clip.
We also see roan antelopes, one of the largest of the species, which are endangered due to the high mortality rate of their young – only about 40 percent of calves survive. To boost the populations in the reserve, Lapalala runs breeding programmes for roan, sable and buffalo. At last count they had 300 buffalo, 120 roan and 30 sable in a fenced-off section. After winter most will be released into the reserve; only a small breeding herd will stay behind.
Besides being a bird haven and a leading rhino sanctuary, the reserve is also home to 114 reptiles; 147 mammal species including small mammals like squirrels; 50 species of fish and 33 amphibian species.
Over our two days at Lapalala, we take most of our meals outdoors. On day one we have al fresco canapes on the deck of the lodge and fireside sundowners with a view. Day two brings two riverside picnics and a candlelit dinner under the stars. And just before we head off on the third day, we’re treated to a bush breakfast with all the trimmings: pans of baked beans, sausages, mushrooms, oats, potatoes, eggs and bacon sizzling away over the coals. As we sip our coffee and green juice, a monkey climbs the tree overhead, keeping an eye out for leftovers.
I also tried crocodile sausages at dinner – they taste a bit like pork, but with a gamey tinge – as well as wildebeest steaks. Make sure to sample the malva pudding and the shortbread cookies served with tea and coffee at the lodge – that jar’s contents took quite a knock.
We also managed to tick off quite a few activities: a bush walk to see rock art, a sunset cruise on the Palala (a few buffalo watched, glassy-eyed, as we drifted past, but we hightailed it homeward after spotting hippos in the distance), bush dining galore and stargazing – the closest town is Vaalwater,
70km away, so there is no light pollution, making this an ideal spot for it.
If you have more time, take a dip in one of the crystal rock pools; go flyfishing; visit the Wilderness School; join tracking expeditions to see cheetah, lions, rhinos and elephants; or go hiking or birding. Or just relax at the spa. No judgement. There’s a watering hole right in front of Tintswalo’s deck, so you can spot animals before you’ve even left the lodge.
And if you’re feeling adventurous, book the elevated sleep-out deck, a raised wooden platform where you can spend a night completely out in the elements, with views for days – without really roughing it: you have a bed, mosquito net and a basic bathroom.
I never quite plucked up the courage to take a dip in the plunge pool, but on my last night I braved the cold and had a candlelit bath under the stars. There was a lot of snuffling, grunting and rustling going on in the vicinity, but I told myself it was just a lovesick impala and sipped the sherry I’d discovered in my wardrobe to soothe my nerves.