We talk to writer and artist Shubnum Khan about her latest book, a memoir, and feature an extract from it
If travelling is the antidote to ignorance, then Durban-based author and artist Shubnum Khan is very enlightened. Among other things, we talk to her about her latest book, How I Accidentally Became a Global Stock Photo and Other Strange and Wonderful Stor
Imagine walking into a McDonald’s in Beijing and discovering that, unbeknownst to you, your face is plastered all over the wall in their latest advertising campaign. When this happened to Shubnum Khan in early 2018, she posted a thread on Twitter, starting, ‘So today I’m going to tell you the story of how I ended up with my face on a McDonald’s advert in China – a cautionary tale.’ Herein she detailed the dangers of signing contracts you don’t fully understand, as she had done on a photo shoot as a young university student.
The Tweet went viral.
After that she was frequently contacted by family members, friends and strangers to inform her of her numerous digital alter egos. She was Bonny Seng, a Cambodian trek guide; Kelsey from Arizona, who raved about a family vacation she had taken in Florida; and Dina M, who promoted a skin cream called Dermolyte, among others.
Shubnum was soon approached by a publisher and asked to put more of her adventures (and misadventures) to paper. The result is her new memoir, a collection of short stories with titles like ‘Interrogated about my secret marriage’, ‘I almost went to Guantanamo Bay’ and ‘A secret journey to South Korea’. Though quirky and humorous, the gravity behind each tale hints at the eloquent woman behind the pen.
Her life may have taken her to glittering cities like Shanghai and New York, but at the centre of it all Shubnum’s is in fact a journey of selfdiscovery, carving out what it means to be a Muslim woman, particularly a single Muslim woman, in South Africa and in the modern world.
What makes a good writer?
To be a good writer you have to be a good reader. I read more than 70 memoirs while writing this book because I needed to find my writing voice. During lockdown I developed
I want to share my journey with other women so that they know it’s okay to be on your own path – own it and be proud of it.
this habit of walking up and down the passage in my house while I read, so it doubled as an exercise routine!
It was scary sharing so much of myself through these anecdotes – I am an anxious person, as I say in the book – but I’m at a point in my life where I wanted to write something where I could be true to myself and be proud of what I’ve achieved.
What did growing up with three sisters teach you about the bonds between women?
I didn’t realise it until I wrote this book, but growing up with sisters really made me feel supported as a child and now as an adult. They know what it’s like to be a woman, particularly a Muslim woman, and the kinds of internal and external struggles we face. I wanted to change the narrative that only having daughters, as my parents did, is a ‘bad’ thing. It’s actually kind of the greatest thing ever!
Emotional support is what gets you through life, and that’s what my sisters give me.
You talk about feeling like an outsider when you started high school, when you visited India for the first time and during your residency in China. Do you still feel like an outsider?
Definitely. This book is about not fitting in and trying to make your own path. At the end of the chapter where I attend a party in New York’s Upper East Side I say, ‘When you are beginning to learn who you are, you stop trying to fit in by changing and start trying to find where you fit in by being yourself.’
So yeah, I might not be conventional in the way that traditional society wants, and there are many social functions I avoid because I still feel as though someone might come up to me and tell me they’re praying for me to get married!
As a young woman you’re told you have to marry by a certain age and have children by a certain age. I didn’t do those things, but I don’t feel sad about it. I just feel like this is the way my life is supposed to be, and I’m okay with it.
I want to share my journey with other women so that they know it’s okay to be on your own path. People will try to make you feel bad about not being like everybody else, but it’s up to you to kindle your own flame.
When interrogated at the Canadian embassy you say the following: ‘It was my first time travelling to a “First World country” and it was a startling introduction to the hierarchy of my position in the world as an African, as a Muslim and as a young woman.’
It was my first time travelling west, and it was such a strange situation being called in for an interview from Durban to Joburg and being asked questions about my marital status and religion, only to realise at the end of it that the embassy had probably just mistaken me for my mother on her wedding day in a small Facebook profile picture. I don’t think I would have been questioned so forcefully or rudely had I not been Brown or a woman. I understood then that this is the kind of role you’re supposed to fit into when you’re traveling as a Muslim or as a woman, and you have to be prepared for the kind of questioning that comes with it.
When did your eyes open to the transformative power of travel?
Probably when I travelled to New York for a writer’s residency. For me it was a combination of many factors. First, I was depressed, and second, I didn’t have any expectations for the city itself. Not to mention I was alone for the very
first time, having travelled with my parents my entire life.
I entered this world capital just as spring was starting to fill the world around me with new life. So much was happening that I wasn’t prepared for. I got completely sucked into it; I would look at the buildings and think about the people living in each apartment and it seemed, after being so sad, that there was so much life and noise, and nature was showing me that there was the possibility of life beginning again. That was a pivotal moment for me, and I realised there’s a whole world out there and that life can be pretty awesome if you look at it with the right eyes.
Considering your headshot was displayed on billboards around the world without your knowledge, how do you feel about technology and social media now?
I’m in a lovehate relationship with social media. On the one hand this book was made possible by a publisher who approached me about the stories I was sharing on Twitter. And as a single person staying at home, social media is my outlet. It keeps me healthy socially, but I know it can be toxic for one’s mental health, too. Facebook was bad for me because I would just scroll my feed and engage mindlessly. I didn’t need to check on other people or have so much unnecessary information. I deleted Instagram for a year for a similar reason. It’s about knowing and monitoring yourself: are you using it as a tool of growth or a tool of comparison? I don’t think it’s intrinsically good or bad – it’s how you use it.
What’s next?
I am working on a magic-realism novel. I’ve been putting together micro-memoirs, or montages, if you like, of what it’s been like living with my parents for so long and being single for so long.