HIP TO HYPOCRISY
From a gala dinner brimming with hypocrisy — would anyone like another glass of Rupert & Rothschild Classique? — to hip and cool Parkhurst
The ANC’S gala dinners, usually held at the beginning of national conferences, never fail to impress. No, I am not talking about the speeches. President Jacob Zuma is usually the keynote speaker at these events and by the end of his twohour marathons half the room is asleep. The rest of the guests are playing footsie with the Gupta family.
The galas are mostly organised by the Progressive Business Forum, an organisation started by the National
Party guys who dumped the DA in the early 2000s and threw their lot in with the ANC. It’s like the Broederbond, only with a broad-based BEE certificate.
So last week people who don’t have a life (like me) descended on the ANC policy conference at Nasrec. After months of rhetoric about “white monopoly capital” and “radical economic transformation” from the likes of Zuma, we were itching to hear what it all means. You will wait a long time to get an answer, a friend whispered in my ear. I agreed. But I am an optimist.
As usual there was a gala dinner the evening before the policy conference. Mzwanele Manyi, keen defender of all that is Gupta and a great proponent of the nebulous “radical economic transformation”, was there. Then there were the usual suspects: chiefs of stateowned enterprises recycling taxpayer money straight into ANC coffers. We all have to do our bit, I guess.
Imagine the shock and horror on Zuma’s face when he passed the wine down — the man doesn’t touch the devil drink, which may explain a few things — and noticed that it was the excellent Rupert & Rothschild Classique. It is described by the estate thus: “Inviting, fresh raspberry aromas with pomegranate undertones and a subtle, smooth, balanced palate with lingering cranberry and cedarwood nuances.”
I have tasted it. Gorgeous. Zuma and his faction in the ANC have been banging on about the perniciousness of “white monopoly capital”, but when it came down to their wine they did not think twice. And the food? Smoked salmon, Nordic beef medallions with British hollandaise sauce. Lovely. Did someone say something about a technical recession?
Ah well. I gave up on the hypocrisy at the ANC policy conference and went off with my kids and lovely wife to Craft in Parkhurst. It’s been going for a while and is wildly popular among the young and trendy. My daughter recommended it after going there with friends.
We sat outside in the sun. On weekends the main drag is full of young people walking dogs or kids — or both — and looking cool. The drinks menu is chock-a-block with craft beers, wines and milkshakes (my daughters had some eye-popping stuff like the humungous Ferrero Rocher milkshake). I had a mojito and a cinnamon-infused whisky sour. Incredible!
The food is varied. There is a distinct Deep South influence. One of my daughters ordered deep-fried chicken and waffles. My heart lurched just looking at the batter on that thing. The burgers are also massive. My wife and I shared a seafood platter that turned out to be hugely disappointing — it arrived stone cold and tasteless. They did exchange some of the dishes (squid and mussels) for a fresh batch, though.
Service was excellent from start to finish. Verdict? This is a lovely, cool, hip and happening place. The food wasn’t that great, but for the younger set this seems to be the place to go.
Craft ★★★½
33 4th Avenue Parkhurst, Johannesburg Tel: (011) 788-7111
★★★★★ Makhosi Khoza ★★★★ Excellent ★★★ Good ★★ Poor ★ Jacob Zuma