Love “I don’t want anything serious”
Is that just u or a major warning sign? Answers ahead.
Q“I’m ready for a real partner, but so many guys I’ve seen on dating apps or been on first dates with say upfront they’re ‘not looking for anything serious’. A male friend told me that’s just something guys say, and with the right woman, they wouldn’t even think twice about committing. Is he right? Should I give the ‘nothing serious’ guys a chance or is it idiotic to think one could be boyfriend material?” – Nonku, 36
A“Your friend was just being nice,” says Jared Freid, cohost of the U Up? podcast. “If a guy says that on a date, it’s to let you know that he’ll sleep with you, but he won’t be with you. And if it’s on his profile, it’s like the small print on a contract that will get him out of it in case things get too serious; he can always say, ‘I never lied to you! I said I wasn’t looking for anything serious on my profile.’
“Bottom line: if your standard is someone who also wants a relationship, it sounds like these guys aren’t good enough for you.”
Another reason to swipe left on these type of people? “Giving them a chance seems like such a waste of your time,” says Amy Van Doran, founder of a matchmaking service. “Maybe you could convert one of the ‘nothing serious’ types, but dating is already hard. Why make it harder? Plus, dealing with that energy on a first date sounds awful. Personally, I’m not interested in helping men figure out that I’m not so bad to be around. It’s too much effort.” Amen!