Elon’s polygon bakkie

Tesla, Inc recently unveiled its electric Cybertruck. Unlike other Tesla vehicles with flattering curves, the Cybertruck is all angles. The peculiar styling has divided public opinion: on the one hand, there are the Tesla fanboys who rave about its appearance, and on the other, the haters who ridicule it.

To us is appears as if Tesla’s boss, Elon Musk, tasked a three year-old to design the Cybertruck using nothing but crayons and a ruler. Inside, there are zero buttons on the dash and they are all replaced by a single touchscreen that – quite democratically – is placed halfway between the driver and the front passenger.

Also, it doesn’t seem as if Elon understands what the purpose of a bakkie is. Those flat panels on the hull will deform over time due to metal fatigue, unless the steel is unusually thick, which ads weight. And just how exactly will you load cargo from the sides?

As illustrated on the right, the Cybertruck is optimistically shown as a camping vehicle with a drawer system and tent on the load bin. However, we know from experience that you have to be a contortionist to sleep comfortably in the back of a double-cab's load bin.

The bakkie also ignores various traffic regulations: the brake light is on the tailgate – something American law doesn’t allow – and the wing mirrors are gone, replaced by cameras (something no nation on Earth allows).

The official launch was reminiscent of April Fool’s Day: Elon boasted that Cybertruck’s windows were unbreakable, but when one of his employees proceeded to demonstrate it, they shattered on impact.

Elon revealed his flagship Cybertruck has a range of 800 km, can reach 0 to 100 km/h in 3 seconds and can tow 6,3 tonne. Three versions will be built: a base model with one electric motor for two-wheel drive, another with two motors for four-wheel drive, and a tri-motor flagship model.